In many parts of the world, children and teenagers are committing more crimes. Why is this happening? How should they be punished?

One of the social concerns today relates to

criminals

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. In many nations worldwide, the average rates of

children

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and teenagers committing

crimes

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have gradually increased. In

this

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essay, I am going to demonstrate some causes of

this

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phenomenon

as well as

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propose some solutions that can be taken into consideration to

minimize

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minimise

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the impacts of

this

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growing trend. The reasons behind the increasing mental trauma among

children

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apply

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and how

this

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contributes to a rise in juvenile crime

Punctuation problem

apply

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can be

Wrong verb form

are

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questionable.

Firstly

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, one of the key factors leading to the increasing rate of juvenile crime nowadays is psychological distress, meaning that some young

criminals

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suffered through mental trauma as they were raised in dysfunctional households, where there is violence, neglect, and a lack of proper moral guidance.

Consequently

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, mental distress may impair individuals’ ability to manage their emotions, making them more prone to anger and, in extreme cases, even violent acts

such

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as murder.

Secondly

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, despite the belief held by many people that uneducated, abandoned

children

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are mostly involved in juvenile

crimes

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, I do believe that there are more factors that can be associated with

this

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issue. Albeit being well-educated, some

children

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still commit

crimes

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due to

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peer pressure.

This

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means that they are negatively influenced by friends or social groups that engage in illegal

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

, in order to gain parental acceptance or to prove themselves.

Lastly

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, personal excitement can play a crucial role in causing juvenile

crimes

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For instance

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, some

children

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use their intelligence and education to commit more calculated

crimes

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, as they might engage in cybercrimes, fraud, or manipulation—

offenses

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offences

show examples

that require a certain level of knowledge. Despite the rise of the problem, there are some measures that can be implemented to mitigate the impacts.

Firstly

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, governments should implement strict policies to punish young

criminals

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as a role model for others.

Secondly

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, I do believe that strict parental supervision would not be an effective solution.

For example

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, psychologically distressed offspring need emotional support to help them overcome their hardship. In

this

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case, they should not be strictly supervised. Eventually, it is evident that not only should policies targeting young

criminals

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be implemented, but the government should

also

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ban toxic and aggressive acts on social platforms to reduce cybercrimes

as well as

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cyberbullying. In conclusion,

although

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there are numerous causes of

this

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alarming phenomenon—juvenile

crimes

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—eventually, it can come down to a lack of moral guidance and social influence.

Nevertheless

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, there are some solutions that can be taken to address the problems.

yeshomeclass

Jul 16, 2025

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coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph clearly presents one main idea and connects well to the overall argument.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your points and make your argument stronger.

coherence cohesion

Improve the introduction by clearly stating the causes and solutions right away, and make sure the conclusion summarizes key points effectively.

task achievement

You have identified important causes of juvenile crime, such as psychological distress and peer pressure.

coherence cohesion

The essay is organized with clear paragraphs for causes and solutions, showing a good structure overall.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

410 words

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In many parts of the world, children and teenagers are committing more crimes. Why is this happening? How should they be punished?

Your opinion

Many countries aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?