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Writing Samples
Band 5

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.
The provided visual data illustrates global
water
Use synonyms
 consumption patterns across sectors from 1900 to 2000 in Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo.
Overall
Linking Words
, global
water
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 use increased significantly over the century.
In addition
Linking Words
, agricultural
water
Use synonyms
 use has consistently been a
dominat
Correct your spelling
dominant
 factor.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there is a huge disparity between Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo in terms of
water
Use synonyms
 used. From 1900 to 2000, total
water
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 extraction worldwide surged dramatically, rising from about 500 km³ to over 4500 km³. Agriculture remained the highest, which grew rapidly from around 500 km³ to approximately 3000 km³ in 2000.
While
Linking Words
 the industrial use
initially
Linking Words
 was minimal,
but
Correct word choice
apply
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it experienced a sharp increase after 1950, reaching just over 1000 km³.
Besides
Linking Words
, the domestic consumption showed a
more slowly
Replace the word
slower
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 rise, ending the period at roughly 300 km³. The table outlines the most significant contrasts between the tew countries in 2000. Despite Brazil
had
Wrong verb form
having
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 a much larger population and more irrigated land, its
water
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 consumption per person stood at 359 m³.
This
Linking Words
 figure exceeded
over
Rephrase
apply
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forty times
of
Correct pronoun usage
that of
show examples
 the one in Congo, which only had 8 m³ per human

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, km³ with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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