IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shop that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shop that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
This
Linking Words
 line graph illustrates the
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of shop closures and openings over the period from 2011 to 2018. In 2011, the number of
shut down
Use the right word
shut-down
show examples
shops
Use synonyms
 was over 8000, and the
avelible
Correct your spelling
available
stores
Use synonyms
 were over 6000.
However
Linking Words
, after a year,
there
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 can be seen
there
Correct word choice
that there
show examples
 was a
sharply declining
Replace the word
sharp decline
show examples
 in the number of closing
shops
Use synonyms
, with accuratly 4000,
while
Linking Words
 opening
shops
Use synonyms
 slowly reduced to 6000.
Besides
Linking Words
, in 2013, they
also
Linking Words
 both increased to 7000 and 5000
respectivily
Correct your spelling
respectively
.
In addition
Linking Words
, there is
also
Linking Words
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
noticeble
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 information in 2015. The
quantities
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
stores
Use synonyms
 going
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 bankruptcy dropped
dramaticly
Correct your spelling
dramatically
 to around 1000;
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 at the same time, the number of opening
shops
Use synonyms
were
Verb problem
apply
show examples
only
slightly fell
Correct word order
fell slightly
show examples
 to 4000. In the end year of the chart provides, the
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
closure
Fix the agreement mistake
closures
show examples
 and
opening
Fix the agreement mistake
openings
show examples
Use synonyms
stores
Change preposition
of stores
show examples
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 just over 5000 and 3000 each.
Overall
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 curve graph offers the information about whether
stores
Use synonyms
Verb problem
are opeing
show examples
opeing
Correct your spelling
opening
 or closing, with a clear declining
trends
Fix the agreement mistake
trend
show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, stores with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend
  • peak
  • decline
  • fluctuation
  • correlation
  • inverse relationship
  • notable
  • comparable
  • speculate
  • external factors
  • increment
  • decrement
  • overall
  • composite
  • linear
  • net gain
  • net loss
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