IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the ‎causes of this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on society.‎

Take
Wrong verb form
Taking
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little
Correct article usage
a little
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time
Use synonyms
 to stay at home is now new, but only
until
Change preposition
apply
show examples
recently
has
Verb problem
apply
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been discussed to a larger extent. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, the key
underlysing
Correct your spelling
underlying
 reasons behind
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 there
pointing
Wrong verb form
pointed
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 out
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
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consequences
Check wording
apply
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and benefits.
To begin
Linking Words
wih
Correct your spelling
with
, the trend seems to be caused by various factors , with the primary one being that a large and heavy of work, so people are spending more
time
Use synonyms
 at the office to complete
them
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 work. Another probable contributing factor is that many young people prefer spending
time
Use synonyms
 outside after
tiring
Correct article usage
a tiring
show examples
 and stressful day, they
enjoying
Wrong verb form
enjoy
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 social activities,
such
Linking Words
 as
watch
Replace the word
watching
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 movies, peers for
meal
Correct article usage
a meal
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 with friends and coworkers.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the phenomenon comes with serious implications. First and foremost, a clear consequence is that when people lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 at home contributes to exhaustion, burnout and prevents individuals from relaxing.
In addition
Linking Words
, another
potentialy
Correct your spelling
potentially
 harmful
out come
Use the right word
outcome
show examples
 to take into account is
thatthose
Correct your spelling
that those
 who go out frequently can result
reduced
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in reduced
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 financial reserves, harder to save money. In conclusion, through what has been discussed about the root causes of
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
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 less and less
time
Use synonyms
 at home, it is evident that the trend comes with dire consequences
about
Change preposition
for
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 family, life, physical health and mental health.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 it helps
eople
Correct your spelling
people
 feel
relax
Replace the word
relaxed
show examples
, not
loneliness
Replace the word
lonely
show examples
.

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task achievement
Your ideas are present but need more development and depth. Ensure each point is well explained with examples.
coherence and cohesion
There are some grammatical errors that make your writing hard to follow. Check your sentences for clarity and correctness.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but do not clearly summarize or introduce your main points. Strengthen these parts to guide your reader better.
coherence and cohesion
Consider separating your ideas into paragraphs. Each paragraph should cover a single main idea to improve flow.
task achievement
You identified some relevant causes and effects of spending less time at home.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which is a good start.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • job demands
  • work-life balance
  • remote working
  • digital entertainment
  • public spaces
  • urbanization
  • social and recreational options
  • networking
  • commuting
  • blurred boundaries
  • extroverted societal expectation
  • cafes and coworking spaces
  • smaller living spaces
  • cultural changes
What to do next:
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