In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is considered very important. Why might this be the case? Is this a positive or negative situation?

The preference for owning a
home
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rather than renting one varies from country to country. We need to assess the reason for
this
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social phenomenon and its effects. Some people tend to own a
home
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for a number of
reason
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reasons
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. In some countries, buying a
home
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is a good investment, as there is an increasing inflation that affects deposits and house expenses, which puts individuals in a difficult situation.
Therefore
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, those who possess their homes can later sell them at a higher price, but those who cannot have to pay higher rents year after year.
Additionally
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, owning a
home
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in some countries is considered a success and puts the person at a better social status, and they are considered to be people with stable incomes and financially secure jobs.
As a result
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, homeowners are looked up to.
This
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development can be positive and negative at the same time. The increasing demand for owning a
home
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means building more houses and apartments in the first place, so there will be a growing demand for the workforce, including engineers.
As a result
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,
this
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provides a variety of job opportunities in society.
On the other hand
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, in order to own a
home
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, individuals may work extra hours on weekends and put themselves under pressure.
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will reduce their leisure time and even quality time with their families. In the long run,
this
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will result in serious mental health issues, and they will have to deal with anxiety and depression later in life. In conclusion, owning a
home
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is a decision
that is
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made
due to
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financial and cultural reasons,
such
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as investment factor and social status. Considering the circumstances, it can have both negative and positive effects.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each point you discuss clearly ties back to the question. Each paragraph could introduce one clear idea that directly relates to your argument.
task achievement
Include specific examples to support your ideas. Instead of general statements, try to give more detailed instances that illustrate your points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures and use transition words to improve flow between ideas. This will help make your essay easier to read.
content
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and sets the stage for your discussion.
content
You presented both positive and negative aspects of owning a home, showing a balanced view.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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