Some parents want their children to read only serious educational books at all times, and they think it is a waste of time to read any entertainments books.What is your opinion about this?

Nowadays, serious educational
books
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are preferred by some parents because they want their child to read
this
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kind all the time , and parents do not want their
children
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to waste time on
entertainment
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books
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. In my opinion,
entertainment
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books
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can help
children
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face the obstacles in real life and help them feel more refreshed and happier for a variety of reasons.
Firstly
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,
entertainment
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books
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can encourage
children
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to handle some blocks in their real life.
This
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kind of book always turns around the problems and solutions of people in many situations and places.
For example
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, in Vietnam, there is a popular series titled Trang Quynh. There are many troubles from
the
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apply
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ancient Vietnam and the way that Trang Quynh solved these difficulties.
This
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series helps many Vietnamese
children
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perceive and reconsider their lifestyle
as well as
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the ways they face issues, etc.
Secondly
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,
entertainment
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books
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can
aid
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help
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young readers feel more comfortable. They can relax and chill when they enjoy reading these
books
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because it will make their mental health better, decrease depression, anxiety, etc
...
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When they feel cosy, they can have a better score in academic performance, which is a benefit that
entertainment
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books
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bring for
children
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. In conclusion, some parents feel that reading serious educational
books
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will be more useful for their
children
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than
entertainment
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books
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. In my point of view,
children
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should read
entertainment
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books
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more as it helps them have better mental health, decreases stress and helps them deal with the problems in life.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to provide a clearer connection between your ideas and organize them into paragraphs more distinctly. Each paragraph should have a main idea that relates back to your opinion.
task achievement
Make sure to elaborate more on your ideas. Clearly explain how entertainment books improve mental health or provide more specific examples that relate to your main points.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic and presents a clear opinion which is important for task achievement.
task achievement
The examples used, such as 'Trang Quynh,' provide a context that enhances the argument supporting entertainment books.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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