IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that planing for the future is a waste of time because they think that focusing on the present is more important. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

It is argued that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 it is unnecessary to think about a vague
future
Use synonyms
 that has not come yet.
In
Change preposition
From
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 my perspective,
Use synonyms
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 is worth thinking about. On the one hand, ones who have a
plan
Use synonyms
 are more likely to become successful. One reason can be
they
Correct word choice
that they
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 are more motivated. In fact, having a dream is
in
Change preposition
apply
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close connection
Replace the word
closely connected
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 with the amount of motivation
people
Use synonyms
 attain.
For instance
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 a study conducted by Harvard University, 80% of
well-achieved
Punctuation problem
well-achieved,
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 self-motivated students had devised a
plan
Use synonyms
 for their
future
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the ones who have a
plan
Use synonyms
 are able to choose the suitable path for
them
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
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.
This
Linking Words
 means having a
plan
Use synonyms
 helps them to refrain from the mistakes ordinary
people
Use synonyms
 make.
This
Linking Words
 is because they are determined and do not give in to what is considered temptation for other
people
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, focusing on
present
Correct article usage
the present
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 turns
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 into
a
Correct article usage
apply
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lazy
pleasure-seeker
Fix the agreement mistake
pleasure-seekers
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, as
people
Use synonyms
 naturally tend to live life to the full, but
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 it should
also
Linking Words
 be noted that sometimes seizing today’s joy can lead to tomorrow’s sorrow. To make it clear, if a person concentrates on
present
Correct article usage
the present
show examples
, he/she is likely to keep themselves busy
with
Change preposition
apply
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entertaining themselves, without considering the consequences it might bring about.
This
Linking Words
 may result in having an unaccomplished life.
In addition
Linking Words
, thinking ahead makes
effort
Correct article usage
the effort
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 valuable. If you have a goal, you have something to try for.
This
Linking Words
 makes it easier to tolerate hardship. In conclusion, I would restate that
,
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apply
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 having a bright
future
Use synonyms
 requires planning for it in advance.

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task achievement
Try to develop your ideas further. Provide more explanation or details for your points to make them clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure you use linking words to connect your ideas better. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
You included relevant examples that supported your points, which is great.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion were clear, helping to frame your essay well.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • unexpected expenses
  • career advancement
  • long-term goals
  • structured approach
  • personal development
  • educational goals
  • fulfilling life
  • spontaneous experiences
  • emotional fulfillment
  • embrace opportunities
  • mental health
  • reduce stress and anxiety
  • mindfulness
  • balanced approach
  • flexibility and adaptation
What to do next:
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