in a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructiong new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In modern times, public transport between cities is a very important issue. Related to
this
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some individuals support the construction of high-speed train
lines
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.
However
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, others think that it is necessary to improve existing public transport.
This
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essay will discuss both two views and give my own opinion. On the one hand, city dwellers must reduce their dependence on cars and buses for traffic problems.
Moreover
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, parking a car is extremely difficult in big cities. That's why city ​​officials should take steps in order to develop new railway
lines
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. Fast
trains
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help people can travel quickly from one city to another. New speed
trains
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which are cheap and fast can make intercity transportation more effective.
Also
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, fast
trains
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are very comfortable and environmentally friendly. So governments should spend a large amount of money on building railway
lines
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to both promote tourism and reduce pollution.
For example
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, the Novosti agency reports that a new type of passenger train in Japan has reached a record speed of 366 kilometres per hour.
On the other hand
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,
instead
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of new projects, improving existing public transport is more practical. Because
,
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apply
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there are bus and metro
lines
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in most developing cities.
Although
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they are dirty, old-fashioned and slow, these issues can be overcome and problems solved. The government can implement these projects more cheaply and in a shorter time. The budget can
also
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cover these costs.
Additionally
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, investment in existing buses and
trains
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will ease traffic congestion. In conclusion, I believe that it is more important to invest in current public transit,
then
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the government can start thinking about fast train projects.

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task achievement
Clarify your position in the introduction by explicitly stating your opinion on whether to invest in high-speed trains or improve existing transport. This will help guide the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Consider providing a stronger conclusion that summarizes your main points and reinforces your opinion more clearly. You may want to restate your main argument with more emphasis.
coherence and cohesion
Try to enhance the logical flow of ideas by using transition words more effectively to link sentences and paragraphs. This will improve the overall coherence of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to proofread for minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'help people can travel quickly.' This will enhance the clarity of your essay.
content
The essay presents a clear discussion of both sides of the argument, which is essential for addressing the task requirements.
content
The use of examples, such as the speed train in Japan, adds depth to your argument and supports your points effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Overall, the structure is mostly clear, with a logical progression of ideas between paragraphs.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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