The bar chart shows the percenatge partiripation of men in senior development in 3 companies from 1980 to 2010

The bar chart shows the percenatge partiripation of men in senior development in 3 companies from 1980 to 2010
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart shows the percenatge partiripation of men in senior development in 3 companies from 1980 to 2010
The bar chart elucidates the
proportion
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of male employees occupying senior development roles within three prominent corporations –
IBM
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,
Microsoft
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, and
Apple
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– across the three-decade period from 1980 to 2010.
Overall
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, the data reveals a discernible upward trajectory in the representation of men in high-level positions within all three companies. Notably,
IBM
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consistently maintained the most substantial
proportion
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of male senior developers throughout the observed timeframe. In 1980,
Apple
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exhibited the highest initial percentage of men in senior roles, registering at approximately 13%.
This
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contrasted sharply with
IBM
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and
Microsoft
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, which recorded significantly lower figures of 2% and 6%, respectively.
Subsequently
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, between 1980 and 1990,
IBM
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experienced a dramatic surge in its male senior development workforce, escalating to 12%, thereby matching
Apple
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’s
proportion
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, which had marginally declined. Concurrently,
Microsoft
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witnessed a gradual yet steady ascent, reaching close to 10%. By 1995, the percentage of male senior employees at
IBM
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commenced
Verb problem
stood
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at a noteworthy 25%, surpassing both
Microsoft
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(13%) and
Apple
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(20%).
Subsequently
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,
IBM
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underwent a period of remarkable expansion, culminating in a figure of approximately 66% in 2010. A similar, albeit less pronounced, trend was evident in the data for
Microsoft
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, which reached 45%. In stark contrast,
Apple
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demonstrated the lowest
proportion
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, plateauing at 25% by the end of the period.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "subsequently".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, ibm, microsoft, apple with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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