Many people believe that modern music can have a negative impact on the young. Others believe the effect of modern music is positive. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. #217

Music

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has always been part of human life, from childhood to old age, and it plays a significant role in daily activities across a wide range of genres. Some

people

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argue that modern

music

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can have harmful effects on young

people

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However

Linking Words

, others believe it offers positive influences. The following essay will examine these perspectives before giving a personal opinion. On one hand,

music

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has the ability to create an emotional connection. Teenagers are still in a phase of discovering their identity, which often makes them emotionally driven.

Music

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serves as a medium to express and release

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

various emotions through listening or creating

music

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For instance

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, when adolescents feel disappointed about failing to achieve something, they might play melancholic songs to process their sadness, rather than expressing it through destructive behaviours like breaking things or harming themselves.

As a result

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, they feel more comforted by the melodies they hear.

On the other hand

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, some

people

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argue that modern

music

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can cause individuals to lose sight of their primary responsibilities.

Although

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certain genres help to focus and boost motivation during specific activities, some types of

music

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have a lingering effect on the mind, making listeners want to sing and replay the songs repeatedly. A good example is "Supernova", a song by a K-pop group in South Korea known for its addictive melody. During exam periods, the government even banned

this

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song from being played in order to help students maintain their focus.

Therefore

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, many others consider modern

music

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to have detrimental effects on young

people

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. In conclusion,

while

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some argue that modern

music

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can hinder young

people

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from progressing, others believe it allows them to express their emotions. I personally believe that the benefits of modern

music

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far outweigh the drawbacks.

nineband9s

Jul 21, 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to provide a stronger conclusion that summarizes the main points more clearly.

coherence

Add clearer transitions between ideas in the paragraphs to improve flow.

task achievement

Try to give more detailed examples to support your main points.

task achievement

You presented both sides of the argument well.

coherence

The emotional connection with music was described effectively in your writing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

lifestyles and behaviours
glorify
distract
academic performance
self-expression
identity formation
source of inspiration
social and political messages
amplifying
accessible
influential
parental and educational guidance
critically analyze
responsible consumption
mitigate

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Many people believe that modern music can have a negative impact on the young. Others believe the effect of modern music is positive. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. #217

Your opinion

“The only way to improve road safety is to have stricter punishments for driving offenders. To what extent do you agree or disagree.”

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

There are not enough recycling bins in your neighborhood. Write a letter to your local council to install more recycling bins. In your letter: - explain the situation; - state its importance to the environment; - ask for more recycling bins.

People in your area are having problems with their internet connection. Write a letter to the company which provides the connection. In your letter: - describe the problems - explain how they are affecting people - say what the company should do to help

In cities, an increasing number of people do not know their neighbours. There is no longer sense of community. What do you think are the causes of this problem and suggest methods to solve it?