IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In many countries, government spent a large amount of money on improving internet access. Why is it happening and do you think it is the most appropriate use of government money?

2.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
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Introduction
In today's world
internet
Use synonyms
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
 a crucial role in our
life
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is one of the major
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
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 in our daily routine.In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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 I will
shedlight
Correct your spelling
shed light
of
Change preposition
on
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how
Rephrase
apply
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if
Change preposition
whether
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 the government
spent
Wrong verb form
spending
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
internet
Use synonyms
 is important or not.
Body paragraph 1
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is
major
Correct article usage
a major
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 in our
Use synonyms
life
Correct word choice
daily life
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time
Check wording
apply
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because it is
thing
Correct article usage
a thing
show examples
 that you can use
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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in your daily
life
Use synonyms
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as
in
Change preposition
at
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 work,school and
contact
Verb problem
to contact
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 your family and friends.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is essential to enhance our
enourmus
Correct your spelling
enormous
life
Use synonyms
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as improving my
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 using
AI
Punctuation problem
AI,
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rise
Verb problem
raising
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 the
comunity
Correct your spelling
community
 of people and
help
Wrong verb form
helping
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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small
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
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.
Body paragraph 3
In my humble
openion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, the money that will
coast
Use the right word
cost
show examples
 the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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 to embrace the
internet
Use synonyms
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will be worth it
Linking Words
However
Punctuation problem
. However
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,
will
Correct pronoun usage
it will
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 increase the economic wealth and improve the city more and more.
Conclusion
To sum up
Linking Words
,
enhance
Wrong verb form
enhancing
show examples
 the
internet
Use synonyms
 will lead the citizens in the city
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
comfortable learning and
perfect
Correct article usage
a perfect
show examples
 style of working.
Adittionally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
,
will
Correct pronoun usage
it will
show examples
 lead to
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
 the people more
enjoyed
Wrong verb form
enjoy
show examples
 during there vacation .

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly state your main ideas in each paragraph. This will help the reader understand your arguments better.
task achievement
Use more examples to support your points. This will help strengthen your argument and show that you understand the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and spelling, as errors can make your writing hard to read.
task achievement
You have introduced the topic and shared your opinion, which is important for this type of essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • government
  • money
  • internet
  • access
  • education
  • resources
  • skills
  • economy
  • business
  • jobs
  • connect
  • areas
  • healthcare
  • quality
  • communication
  • important
  • friends
  • information
  • quickly
  • improve
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