The government’s investment in arts, music and theater is a waste of money. Government should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

It has been argued that

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

should not be spending money on

entertainment

Correct article usage

the entertainment

show examples

and art industry,

whereas

Linking Words

those funds should be used for the betterment of

community

Correct article usage

the community

show examples

This

Linking Words

essay intends to

elobrate

Correct your spelling

elaborate

on the reasons why I completely disagree with

this

Linking Words

notion, in the upcoming

parapgraphs

Correct your spelling

paragraphs

. To commence with,

music

Use synonyms

and art

works

Correct subject-verb agreement

work

show examples

as a kind of therapy for most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people. In today's contemporary epoch, everyone is living a hectic life, and in order to relax, people listen to soothing

music

Use synonyms

or watch a movie.

For example

Linking Words

, every morning

while

Linking Words

going to work, I always put

some

Change preposition

on some

show examples

music

Use synonyms

to calm myself and give a fresh start to

day

Correct article usage

the day

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, individuals with depression are suggested to go to movies with friends or

Verb problem

apply

show examples

watch a series to create a bond with other human beings. People with anxiety and panic attacks are unable to communicate their feelings with other

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

, but by spending time together and watching movies, they feel comfortable and are able to share their emotions.

This

Linking Words

will

further

Linking Words

help them overcome the feeling of sadness and loneliness. Probing

further

Linking Words

theatre

Correct article usage

the theatre

show examples

and

music

Use synonyms

industry are not only a source of entertainment and amusement, but in actual they play a significant role in preserving the culture and traditions. More than that, every country

specifically

Punctuation problem

, specifically

show examples

every

state

Punctuation problem

state,

show examples

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

their own theatre and

music

Use synonyms

which helps to represent the community and traditional values.

For instance

Linking Words

, India is a diverse country, and within

India

Add a comma

India,

show examples

there are three famous entertainment industries -

bollywood

Fix capitalization

Bollywood

show examples

pollywoord

Correct your spelling

Pollywood

, and south indian movies. These three industries are from different parts of India

representing

Punctuation problem

, representing

show examples

different languages and cultures.

Additionally

Linking Words

, the

music

Use synonyms

industry is universal

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

everyone listens to

k-pop

Fix capitalization

K-pop

show examples

english

Fix capitalization

English

show examples

songs, and

punjabi

Fix capitalization

Punjabi

show examples

songs

instead

Linking Words

of belonging to various regions of

world

Correct article usage

the world

show examples

This

Linking Words

furthers

Replace the word

further

show examples

brings the world closer.

To conclude

Linking Words

, it can be inferred from the above confabulation that investment in arts,

music

Use synonyms

and

theater

Use the right word

theatre

show examples

is not a waste of income.

Therefore

Linking Words

, public organisations should continue funding them in order to preserve the cultural background

Linking Words

along

Punctuation problem

, along

show examples

with bringing peace, happiness, and togetherness in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

bhullarsimran2121

Jul 25, 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure to use clear topic sentences for each paragraph. They help organize your ideas better.

task achievement

Try to give more specific examples and details to support your main points.

task achievement

Use simpler and clearer language in some places to improve understanding.

task achievement

You have a clear viewpoint and explain your ideas well throughout the essay.

coherence and cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reinforces your opinion.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

345 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Intrinsic value
Cultural heritage
National identity
Economic impact
Tourism attraction
Social cohesion
Public services
Healthcare
Education
Infrastructure
Robust
Catalyst
Private sector sponsorship
Preserving
Boosting
Enhancing
Fundamental
Necessity
Balancing
Investment

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Some claim that children are more aware of environmental issues than older adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disgree with this opinion?

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Many cannot speak or present well in public. Some people think that it is important to speak well in public, so the training should be from school. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, the number of people suffering from stress is increasing. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to tackle it?