IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

: In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In recent years, purchasing own
home
Use synonyms
 is considered more important than renting, as it
seen
Verb problem
is seen
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 as a symbol of status and financial security in many countries.
In
Change preposition
From
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 my point of view, it is a positive development. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I shall elaborate on the main reasons behind it and why I believe it can have advantageous implications on the individuals and society. To commence with, there are a myriad
consequences
Change preposition
of consequences
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 associated with
this
Linking Words
 trend. The cardinal one is having a good repetition in the society and
neighborhood
Use the right word
neighbourhood
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. To make it clear, in many cities around the world, owning a
home
Use synonyms
 represents
sign
Correct article usage
a sign
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 of success and hard work to achieve
dream
Correct article usage
the dream
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 house. An even more significant fact is that on own private homes has more control as compared to rented
one
Fix the agreement mistake
ones
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. For
explanation
Check wording
example
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, family members can renovate their
home
Use synonyms
 their own way, especially their private rooms
as
Punctuation problem
, as
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 they do not have
contract
Correct article usage
a contract
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 or agreement that
usually rental ones
Correct word order
rental ones usually
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 have. From a broader perspective,
home
Use synonyms
 ownership not only contributes to economic benefits, but
also
Linking Words
 strong
long term
Use the right word
long-term
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 financial benefits.
In addition
Linking Words
 to it, buying
Use synonyms
home
Correct article usage
a home
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 is
also
Linking Words
 a type of investment.
In other words
Linking Words
, property is an investment whose price
increased
Wrong verb form
increases
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 over time to time and
also
Linking Words
 a source of financial stability in difficult
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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 as they can take
loan
Correct article usage
a loan
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 on their house or own apartment.
To sum up
Linking Words
, in view of the arguments outlined above, owning a
home
Use synonyms
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
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combination
Correct article usage
a combination
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 of monetary stability and
sense
Correct article usage
a sense
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 of ownership. I firmly believe that investing in a house has
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more advantages
overall
Linking Words
.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your ideas and support them with good examples. This will help to strengthen your main points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use clear linking words to connect your ideas. This makes it easier for the reader to follow your thoughts.
coherence and cohesion
Check for grammar mistakes and sentence structure. Simple sentences often work well.
task achievement
Good introduction and conclusion that summarize your points well.
task achievement
You discussed some important reasons for owning a home, which is a good start.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
What to do next:
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