Many modern children spend a great deal of time sitting in front of a television or computer screen. This is extremely harmful to their development. Therefore, parent should strictly limit the time that children spend in this way. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

this

Linking Words

modern technological landscape, children are spending

excessive

Correct article usage

an excessive

show examples

amount of

time

Use synonyms

in front of digital devices

such

Linking Words

as television, tablets and

computer

Fix the agreement mistake

computers

show examples

. Some people argue that spending more hours is

deterimental

Correct your spelling

detrimental

to a child's development and

overall

Linking Words

well-being, so parents should set a

time

Use synonyms

limit for their

childern

Correct your spelling

children

. I largely agree with

this

Linking Words

viewpoint,

Correct word choice

and I

show examples

will

also

Linking Words

elaborate on my

reason

Fix the agreement mistake

reasons

show examples

behind it in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, there are a myriad of reasons associated with

this

Linking Words

why

Correct word choice

that

show examples

I favour mentioned sentence. The cardinal one is that not only does too much screen

time

Use synonyms

make them addicted, but

Linking Words

also

Correct pronoun usage

it also

show examples

negatively impacts their mental and physical health. To make it clear, as long as pupils spend extra

time

Use synonyms

to watch

Wrong verb form

watching

show examples

cartoons or other

videos

Punctuation problem

videos,

show examples

they may develop a strong dependency on digital platforms, which

cause

Correct subject-verb agreement

causes

show examples

difficulities

Correct your spelling

difficulties

in social interaction, poor posture and eye strain

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

Furthermore

Linking Words

, limiting screen

time

Use synonyms

encourages children to engage in outdoor games and physical activities, so they get

chance

Correct article usage

a chance

show examples

to have more

face-to -face

Use the right word

face-to-face

show examples

interaction and better cognitive skills.

Moreover

Linking Words

, excess screen

time

Use synonyms

can hinder social skills, as they miss out

Change preposition

on intreaction

show examples

intreaction

Correct your spelling

interaction

with peers and family.

Thus

Linking Words

, all the aforementioned facts

are

Verb problem

apply

show examples

stand against

childern's

Correct your spelling

children's

development.

To sum up

Linking Words

, in view of the arguments outlined above, I firmly believe that more than

sufficent

Correct your spelling

sufficient

use of screens can have a bad impact on

pupils

Check wording

pupils'

show examples

growth and can lead to chronic diseases, so parents should set a

time

Use synonyms

limit for

better

Correct article usage

the better

show examples

health of their children.

sainiarsh070

Jul 27, 2025

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task achievement

Make sure each paragraph clearly supports your main idea with strong examples or explanations.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly.

coherence and cohesion

Check your essay for spelling and grammar errors to improve clarity and understanding.

task achievement

The introduction states your viewpoint clearly.

task achievement

You presented clear arguments about screen time affecting children's development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

249 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

development
health
obesity
eyesight
social skills
interactions
distractions
homework
studying
outdoor play
hobbies
creativity
balance
boundaries
parents

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Many modern children spend a great deal of time sitting in front of a television or computer screen. This is extremely harmful to their development. Therefore, parent should strictly limit the time that children spend in this way. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Topic: In many countries, people are moving away from rural areas and towards urban areas. Why do you think that is? What problems can this cause?

Some people believe that the government should spend more money in putting in more works of art like painting and statutes in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Professional workers like doctors, nurses and teachers make a greater contribution to society and so should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many museums charge for admission, while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.