The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graph
showes
Correct your spelling
shows
data about how many
people
Use synonyms
got involved in a variety of
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
at a social
club
Use synonyms
in Melbourne, Australia
over
Punctuation problem
, over
show examples
a period of two decades. In general, film
club
Use synonyms
and martial arts levelled
over
Change preposition
off over
show examples
the
years
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
As for other types
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
as table
tennis
Punctuation problem
tennis,
show examples
has gain
Wrong verb form
they have gained
show examples
more popularity after 10
years
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
. In
show examples
in
Linking Words
contrast
Punctuation problem
contrast,
show examples
it appears that
people
Use synonyms
lost
intrest
Correct your spelling
interest
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
amateur dramatics just after 5
years
Use synonyms
, another
Punctuation problem
. Another
show examples
activity showed is
muscial
Correct your spelling
musical
performances
Punctuation problem
, whic
show examples
whic
Correct your spelling
which
wasn't introduced until
2005
Punctuation problem
2005,
show examples
since
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
seen
show examples
more
people
Use synonyms
has registered
Wrong verb form
register
show examples
. Looking at the graph, we can see that the film
club
Use synonyms
is having the
hieghest
Correct your spelling
highest
number of members and pretty much
sustain
Correct subject-verb agreement
sustains
show examples
his
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
rank as the most popular activity.
martial
Fix capitalization
Martial
show examples
arts
also
Linking Words
showed
steady
Correct article usage
a steady
show examples
position over the 10
years
Use synonyms
. As for the tennis sport,
dramatic
Correct article usage
a dramatic
show examples
change in the position
occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
2010 as the
participants
Check wording
apply
show examples
number jumped from 20 to 60 in just 10
years
Use synonyms
rendering
Punctuation problem
, rendering
show examples
it
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the second most popular activity in the
club
Use synonyms
.The opposite had happened to the
amateure
Correct your spelling
amateur
dramatics as the data showed
drop
Correct article usage
a drop
show examples
off in the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of
people
Use synonyms
from 30 to roughly 5
registeration
Correct your spelling
registrations
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, club, years with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • participation rates
  • trends
  • significant increases/decreases
  • stable numbers
  • fluctuations
  • overall participation
  • comparison
  • activities
  • social centre
  • Melbourne
  • participants
  • highlight
  • report
  • graph illustrates/demonstrates
  • 20-year period
  • key features
  • main features
  • statistical data
  • variations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: