IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

•Inventors are not as important to society as doctors •To what extent do you agree with this statement Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There is the view that
inventors
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are
Verb problem
do
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 not play an important role in
society
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 as same as
doctors
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.
Verb problem
do.
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While
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 some
agrue
Correct your spelling
argue
 in favour, I oppose
this
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 notion. On the one hand, it is true that
doctors
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 have a direct and immediate impact on people’s lives. They diagnose and treat illnesses, perform surgeries, and save lives on a daily basis. In many cases, without the help of
doctors
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, people would not survive injuries, diseases, or chronic conditions.
For example
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, during the COVID-19 pandemic, millions of
doctors
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 worked tirelessly to help infected patients and reduce the spread of the virus. Their work was essential to keeping societies functioning during a global health crisis.
Therefore
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,
doctors
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 are rightly seen as heroes in many situations
due to
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 their life-saving role.
On the other hand
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,
inventors
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 contribute to
society
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 in less visible but equally important ways. Their innovations provide the tools and technology that make
doctors
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’ work possible.
For instance
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, medical devices
such
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 as X-ray machines, surgical robots, and even basic tools like thermometers were all created by
inventors
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.
In addition
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,
inventors
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also
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 help
society
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 beyond the medical field by developing new forms of communication, transportation, and energy. A good example is the invention of smartphones, which not only improve daily life but
also
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 allow
doctors
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 to consult with patients remotely through telemedicine. Without
inventors
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, modern healthcare and many other areas of life would not function as they do today. In
conculusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
althrough
Correct your spelling
although
doctors
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 play a crucial role in saving lives,
inventors
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 should not be considered less important. Both professions support
society
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 in different but equally valuable ways.
Therefore
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, I believe
inventors
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 are just as important as
doctors
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.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly express your views. You could state your position more directly in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Try to connect your ideas more smoothly. Use linking words to help the flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Check your spelling and grammar. For example, 'conculusion' should be 'conclusion' and 'althrough' should be 'although'.
task achievement
Your use of examples, like the COVID-19 pandemic and smartphones, shows good understanding.
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