IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The plans below show the ground floor of a library in 2001 and how it was redeveloped in 2009.

The floor plans illustrate the comparison of the ground floor library in 2001 and its redecoration in 2009.
Overall
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,
although
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 the digital facilities and librarian’s desk remained unchanged, the library underwent significant changes by 2009, particularly with the addition of new book genres and facilities. In 2001, the librarian’s desk was situated directly opposite the entrance. There were only three book genres available, with self-help and history located next to each other in the western part of the room,
while
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 fiction occupied the northernmost area. The films and DVDs section stood opposite the history section, separated by a group of
tables
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 in the centre. The computers were
place
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placed
show examples
 near the Films and DVDs section. By 2009, major transformations had occurred. All book stacks were reorganised along the western side, now including three additional genres (kitchen, economics, and law), bringing the total to six sections. The former fiction area had been replaced by additional
tables
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,
while
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 the original eight small
tables
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 in the centre were replaced by four longer ones. A children’s area was created between the new and existing
tables
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, providing a dedicated space for young readers.

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task achievement
Make sure to include a clear overall summary statement in your introduction. It helps the reader understand the main changes quickly.
coherence and cohesion
You could improve the flow of your writing by using more linking words, such as 'however', 'in addition', and 'on the other hand'.
task achievement
Include some more details about the changes in layout or the reason behind adding new areas. It adds depth to your descriptions.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and a logical progression of ideas.
task achievement
Good effort in describing the changes with specific examples, like the addition of new book genres.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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