One of the consequences of the improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expentancy is increasing. Do yo think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years, advancements in medical care have extended the average human lifespan, raising an important question about whether
this
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development brings more advantages than drawbacks.
While
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concerns
such
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as increased economic burden on the government welfare systems exist,
this
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essay argues that the advantages, particularly in terms of a low number of diseases and extensive expertise, far outweigh the negatives.
To begin
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with, increased life expectancy allows people to enjoy more time with their families and loved ones, strengthening social bonds across generations.
This
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means that if medical advancements had not occurred, individuals would remain anxious about the constant threat of infectious diseases and not utilise their time effectively. To illustrate
this
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, without improvements in healthcare, there would be no medical safeguards
such
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as vaccinations, early diagnosis, or advanced surgical procedures, all of which help prevent premature death, as was common centuries ago.
Furthermore
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, living longer ensures greater contributions from the elderly population, sharing decades of accumulated expertise in professional and educational fields, which are irreplaceable and benefit both society and the economy. On the downside, an ageing population can not only cause financial strain on national pension systems but
also
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increase pressure on the healthcare system. It is well-known that as individuals age, the likelihood of age-related diseases increases,
such
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as Alzheimer's and arthritis, placing a burden on hospitals that are funded by the government.
For instance
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,
although
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my grandparents contributed to the national workforce for over three decades, they have now been retired for nearly as long, drawing pensions and requiring frequent medical attention, demands that collectively pose sustainability challenges for the country.
To conclude
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, despite the fact that a growing elderly population may pose some serious challenges to the national economy, I am convinced that with strategic measures, people of all age groups can share in the benefits of increased longevity, thanks to high-quality healthcare.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to link your ideas smoothly with clear transitions between points.
task achievement
Include more specific examples or data to support your main arguments.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic and addresses both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • life expectancy
  • medical care
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • aging population
  • healthcare
  • family
  • relationships
  • skills
  • hobbies
  • society
  • workforce
  • economy
  • retirement
  • job availability
  • economic challenges
  • illnesses
  • quality of life
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