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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that the government should fund and support the arts, while others think that it should prioritize other public services such as healthcare and education. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

The allocation of
government
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 funds is a topic of debate, with some arguing that the
government
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 should invest more in public
services
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 rather than
art
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. In
this
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 essay, we will explore both perspectives and provide our own opinion on the matter. Those who believe that the
government
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 should
prioritize
Use the right word
prioritise
show examples
 public
services
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 argue that these
services
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 directly impact the well-being of
citizens
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. Public
services
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such
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 as healthcare, education, and infrastructure are essential for the
development
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 and progress of a
society
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. By investing more in these areas, the
government
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 can ensure that the basic needs of the population are met.
For example
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, improving healthcare facilities and increasing the number of doctors and nurses can lead to better healthcare outcomes and a healthier population. Supporters of
this
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 view argue that the
government
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 has a responsibility to
prioritize
Use the right word
prioritise
show examples
 the welfare of its
citizens
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 by investing in public
services
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 that directly benefit them.
On the other hand
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, proponents of
art
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 argue that it plays a crucial role in
society
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 and should not be overlooked.
Art
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 has the power to inspire, educate, and bring people together. It allows individuals to express themselves creatively and fosters cultural understanding and appreciation.
Moreover
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,
art
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 can have a positive impact on mental health and well-being. By investing in
art
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, the
government
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 can promote cultural enrichment and create opportunities for artists and creative professionals.
For example
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, funding
art
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 programs in schools can nurture the talents of young artists and contribute to their personal and artistic
development
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. Supporters of
this
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 view believe that
art
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 is an integral part of
society
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 and should receive adequate
government
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 support. In my opinion,
while
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 public
services
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 are undoubtedly important,
art
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 should not be neglected. Both public
services
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 and
art
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 contribute to the
overall
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 well-being and
development
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 of a
society
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. It is crucial for the
government
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 to strike a balance between investing in public
services
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 and supporting the arts. By doing so, the
government
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 can ensure the welfare of its
citizens
Use synonyms
while
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also
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 promoting cultural growth and creativity.
For example
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, allocating a portion of the budget to public
services
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 and another portion to
art
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 programs and initiatives can address the needs of the population
while
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also
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 fostering artistic expression and cultural diversity. In conclusion, the debate over
government
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 funding for public
services
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 versus
art
Use synonyms
 is complex.
While
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 public
services
Use synonyms
 are essential for the well-being of
citizens
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,
art
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also
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 plays a significant role in
society
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. Striking a balance between the two is crucial for the
overall
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development
Use synonyms
 and progress of a
society
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
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, the
government
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 should invest in both public
services
Use synonyms
 and
art
Use synonyms
 to ensure the welfare of its
citizens
Use synonyms
 and promote cultural enrichment.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and closely relates to the question.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. This would make your arguments stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Consider adding a summary sentence at the end of each paragraph to reinforce your points.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with clear paragraphs.
task achievement
You present both sides of the argument thoughtfully.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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