It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is sometimes argued that individuals should take
risks
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in both their careers and their personal
lives
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.
While
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I do not agree that
risks
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should be taken blindly, I believe taking necessary
risks
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can be beneficial when carefully considered. On the one hand, taking
risks
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without full consideration could result in negative consequences.
For example
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, some
people
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may resign before they have enough savings or have a clear career plan, and
this
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may lead to financial difficulties if they are not employed
in
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for
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a short time.
In addition
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, if
people
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do not learn about the
risks
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of the investment, they may invest the projects with huge
risks
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, causing financial loss. In some cases,
people
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may pursue risky sports, like mountain climbing, diving, and they may pay a high cost, even with their
lives
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.
On the other hand
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, calculated risk is necessary for our
lives
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to pursue a more successful career or a wonderful life.
Firstly
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, we may lose our opportunities to be successful.
For instance
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, if there is a good business opportunity and we think too much about whether it will be successful without any action, we will avoid all the risk but lose the chance.
Nevertheless
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, by
analyzing
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analysing
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the business and appropriate strategies, it could be a good chance to become successful.
Furthermore
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, if we do not take adventures at all, we may lose the experience of trying different things.
For example
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, if we avoid extreme sports, we may lose the feeling of excitement and the sense of
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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.
However
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, risk can be reduced when
people
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are well-equipped with basic knowledge, professional training, and equipment. In conclusion,
while
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it could lead to some consequences if
people
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take
risks
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impulsively, I believe that being adventurous sometimes is necessary for our
lives
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, and the
risks
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can be controlled if
people
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consider carefully and take steps to reduce
the
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them
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Check wording
apply
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risks
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.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your main opinion in the introduction and echo it in the conclusion. This helps the reader follow your argument more easily.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking words to connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs for better flow. For example, use 'moreover', 'however', or 'in addition'.
task achievement
Provide a few more specific examples to support your points. This makes your argument stronger and clearer.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, showing a good understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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