Some people think that teenagers should make their own decisions, while others think that they are not mature enough and parents should make decisions for them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some
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Some
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people argue that teenagers are not mature enough to make their own
desiplines
Correct your spelling
decisions
.
Linking Words
while
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While
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its sometimes parent could interfere, I believe they should make their decision alone. On one hand, younger
people
Check wording
people's
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attitudes may be
irresbonsible
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irresponsible
due to
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lack
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a lack
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of
experiences
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experience
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in life.
For instance
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, they could be unaware of actions and the consequences
relay
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rely
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on it, which
is
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apply
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eventually
lead
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leads
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to troubles.
For example
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,
while
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i
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I
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was
younger
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younger,
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i
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I
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have
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apply
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always
attempt
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attempted
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to argue so
i
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I
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could drive a car, despite my parents
doesnt
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not
have
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having
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one.
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as
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As
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a
result
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result,
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i
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I
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took my
friends
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friend's
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brother and
i
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I
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fall
Wrong verb form
fell
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in
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into
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accident
Correct article usage
an accident
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. That probably
cause
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caused
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i
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I
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didnt
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didn't
have a plan and
lack
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a lack
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of expertise in the field of roads.
On the other hand
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,
independecy
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independence
for teenagers
are
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is
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crucial to learn in the future.
Fistly
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Firstly
, the more experience they had
the
Punctuation problem
, the
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more handling they got of many difficult
situation
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situations
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.
Also
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prepare them for adult life,
which
Correct word choice
so that
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Linking Words
then
Use the right word
they
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be able to work under pressure normally.
In
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addition
Add a comma
addition,
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they are
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
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aware of their attitude and the
step
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steps
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behind it. These
are
Verb problem
apply
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definatly
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definitely
prepare them
to
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for
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diiferent
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different
aspect
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aspects
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of life.
in
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In
show examples
conclusion, future thinkers and innovators are
generate
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generated
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when they
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
disiplines
Correct your spelling
discipline
.

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task achievement
Try to develop your ideas more fully. Make sure each paragraph has a clear main point and supports it well.
coherence
Work on the organization of your essay. Make sure that each part flows well into the next and that your conclusion clearly summarizes your main points.
coherence
Use correct grammar and punctuation. Check for spelling mistakes and sentence structure errors to make your writing clearer.
task achievement
You express a clear opinion on the topic, which is important for the task.
task achievement
You make an effort to include examples from your own experiences, which can support your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • teenagers
  • decisions
  • mature
  • parents
  • guidance
  • independence
  • experience
  • choices
  • mistakes
  • successes
  • adult life
  • freedom
  • confidence
  • weigh
  • pros and cons
  • life lessons
  • poor decisions
  • growth
  • results
  • knowledge
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