In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In contemporary society, a prominent trend has emerged wherein individuals from rural areas are increasingly relocating to urban environments, resulting in a significant decline in the rural

populace

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population

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. I contend that

this

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phenomenon can yield positive outcomes for individuals' personal and professional development.

Nonetheless

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, it

also

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threatens the viability of essential occupations, particularly in the agricultural sector. One of the most salient benefits of migrating to urban

centers

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centres

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is the enhanced quality of life that accompanies

such

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a transition. Cities provide an array of modern amenities, including well-equipped educational institutions, diverse commercial establishments, advanced healthcare facilities, and efficient public transport systems.

Additionally

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, urban living presents a plethora of career opportunities that foster professional growth.

For instance

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, rural regions often grapple with inadequate healthcare provisions, compelling residents to travel long distances to urban areas for medical attention

while

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contending with transportation difficulties.

Consequently

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this

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migratory trend facilitates improved access to essential services and supports a healthier lifestyle.

However

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this

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urban migration poses significant challenges, particularly the erosion of the agricultural workforce in rural areas. The decline in farmer numbers can lead to critical issues

such

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as environmental degradation, food insecurity, and prolonged droughts, as agriculture plays an indispensable role in both food production and carbon dioxide absorption.

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, with the global population on the rise, the demand for food will only intensify. A pertinent example is the community of Bavil, a small village in Osku, where a mass exodus has precipitated serious problems for walnut orchards,

such

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as pest infestations and inadequate water supply, ultimately resulting in a marked reduction in walnut yields.

Thus

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, the adverse effects of rural depopulation may undermine essential resources. In conclusion, I assert that the migration of individuals to urban

centers

Use the right word

centres

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can open a myriad of opportunities for personal and collective advancement, enabling them to experience enhanced living standards compared to their rural counterparts.

Nevertheless

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, it is imperative to acknowledge the potential repercussions of

such

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demographic shifts, particularly the jeopardization of key sectors like agriculture. Striking a balance between

urbanization

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urbanisation

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and the preservation of vital occupations is essential to mitigate the negative impacts associated with

this

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trend.

m.hadavi20

Aug 5, 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion, but it could be strengthened by stating both sides of the argument more explicitly.

coherence and cohesion

The flow of your essay is good, but ensure each paragraph is clearly linked to the previous one for better coherence.

task achievement

Try to provide a few more specific examples to support your main points, as this will make your argument stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay is well-structured and easy to follow, which makes it engaging for the reader.

task achievement

You provide a clear viewpoint and support it with logical reasons and examples.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

351 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some believe students should not use smartphones at schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Completing a university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent do you agree or disagree?