IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The rapid urbanization of towns and cities has led to numerous problems. Discuss the main causes of urbanization and its effects on society

Continuous development of towns and
cities
Use synonyms
 has brought about a lot of issues. There are various causes and effects of
urbanization
Use the right word
urbanisation
show examples
 regarding society, and
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 thoroughly.
Firstly
Linking Words
, unemployment is the major cause of rural-urban migration, as most job opportunities are found in the urban
cities
Use synonyms
, resulting in
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 number of people moving to those areas.
For instance
Linking Words
, white collar jobs are readily available and accessible in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cities
Use synonyms
 than in smaller towns.
Also
Linking Words
, pay rates are higher, and
this
Linking Words
 brings about citizens neglecting jobs like farming and fishing
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 negatively affects these sectors of the economy.
In addition
Linking Words
, the availability of social amenities in the
cities
Use synonyms
 is to be blamed for
this
Linking Words
 movement.
For example
Linking Words
, schools, hospitals and entertainment
centers
Use the right word
centres
show examples
 are many in the urban areas
forcing
Punctuation problem
, forcing
show examples
 people to travel there.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 results in increased pressure on these fewer facilities as people troop in to
utilize
Use the right word
utilise
show examples
 them
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 is
then
Linking Words
pressurized
Use the right word
pressurised
show examples
 to provide more of
such
Linking Words
.
Check wording
facilities.
show examples
Moreover
Linking Words
, communicable diseases
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
are easily transmitted among individuals
due to
Linking Words
 the high population.
Also
Linking Words
, combustion of fuel from vehicles
contaminate
Correct subject-verb agreement
contaminates
show examples
 the air
leading
Punctuation problem
, leading
show examples
 to respiratory system diseases.
To conclude
Linking Words
, even though
urbanization
Use the right word
urbanisation
show examples
 is good, crime rates
conversely
Linking Words
 increase in
such
Linking Words
 places.

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task
Your essay talks about causes and effects, but it does not show a clear view in the intro. State your main goal and keep it in the first lines.
task
Add more ideas and give examples for each point. Explain why this matters to people.
cohesion
Put ideas in separate paragraphs and use link words to connect them.
language
Fix small grammar errors and keep the words simple.
structure
End with a short sum that restates your view.
structure
Clear plan with 'First', 'In addition', 'Moreover', 'To conclude'.
content
Gives real life ideas like jobs and places.
content
Has a sense of topic and topic area.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urbanization
  • Population growth
  • Rural-to-urban migration
  • Economic opportunities
  • Industrialization
  • Infrastructure development
  • Housing shortages
  • Proliferation of slums
  • Public services
  • Traffic congestion
  • Social inequality
  • Environmental impact
  • Deforestation
  • Cultural shifts
  • Cultural exchange
  • Pollution
  • Overcrowding
  • Investment
  • Job prospects
  • Strain on resources
What to do next:
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