IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that students should take a gap year after finishing school and work or travel during this period. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Students graduating from high school are considered
grown ups
Use the right word
grown-ups
show examples
 for the first time in their lives
, some
Punctuation problem
. Some
show examples
 people believe they need to work or
travel
Use synonyms
 to build up their character, and start relying on their selves. In my opinion,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 think early-adults need to learn to take care of
theirselves
Use the right word
themselves
show examples
 and to gain more experience. A
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 is a one-
year
Use synonyms
 vacation which a student takes after finishing school to work or
travel
Use synonyms
. Making early
grown ups
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grown-ups
show examples
 Work helps them become more social
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 and interactive with other
persons
Check wording
people
show examples
, which could lead to new experiences, teaching them more about the world, and
help
Wrong verb form
helping
show examples
 them to learn
responsability
Correct your spelling
responsibility
.
Traveling
Use the right word
Travelling
show examples
 is
also
Linking Words
 a good idea, which would get them to rely on themselves
while
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
teach
Wrong verb form
teaching
show examples
 them maturity and self-control.
Although
Linking Words
 some people believe taking a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 could lead to some problems
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as
:
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 possible loss of academic momentum, financial strain, and risk of feeling disconnected from peers,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 believe these problems are merely probabilities
while
Linking Words
 benefits are guarantees.
Therefore
Linking Words
, taking a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 better option. Strategic planning for a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 is
also
Linking Words
 important, whether to
travel
Use synonyms
 in winter, summer, fall, or spring, where to
travel
Use synonyms
, and how to
travel
Use synonyms
. Getting a job
also
Linking Words
 needs
such
Linking Words
 as strategic planning
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
travel
Use synonyms
needs
Verb problem
does
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, choosing which job to take, the location of the branch, and the
shift's
Check wording
shift
show examples
 time is important. In conclusion, students graduating from high school are considered adults for the first time
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
, taking a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 would encourage their social ability and later
empolibility
Correct your spelling
employment
 chances.
Although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 strategic planning for the
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 is
also
Linking Words
 important.

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task
Task response: State your view clearly. You agree, but add more view on the other side and give clearer reason why you are right. Make sure you answer all parts of the task and give enough proof or clear ideas.
structure
Coherence and cohesion: Use a plan. Put ideas in a good order and use linking words to show how ideas fit. Shorten long sentences to keep ideas easy to read. Check pronouns and repeat of words to keep flow clear.
stance
You show a clear view and say your stand.
content
Some ideas about why a gap year can help you grow are present.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • employability
  • personal growth
  • life experience
  • academic momentum
  • financial strain
  • disconnected
  • directionless
  • strategic planning
  • structured plan
  • cultural considerations
  • socioeconomic contexts
  • motivated approach
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