IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many individuals believe that taking regular health check-ups is unnecessary if they feel healthy. Do you agree or disagree with this viewpoint? Explain your answer.

Some people believe that regular
health
Use synonyms
 check-ups are not
importaint
Correct your spelling
important
 and necessary
thing
Check wording
apply
show examples
if they
fell
Use the right word
feel
show examples
 Not all of them have free time and funds
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 access to it. I totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 viewpoint, I will provide two main reasons
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
 regular visiting
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
doctor
Use synonyms
 even
you
Correct word choice
if you
show examples
fell
Use the right word
feel
show examples
 healthy.
Firstly
Linking Words
, not all
illneses
Correct your spelling
illnesses
 can be recognised by yourself. Some of them can be very dangerous and
couses
Correct your spelling
cause
another
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
 types of
deseace
Correct your spelling
disease
.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 cancer is one of them. You may be in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good condition and do not
fell
Use the right word
feel
show examples
 any issues with you.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 it can
lasts
Wrong verb form
last
show examples
 for many years, but suddenly you may
dead
Replace the word
die
show examples
. The great solution to prevent cancer is
take
Verb problem
to take
show examples
 care of your
health
Use synonyms
 and
regular
Replace the word
regularly
show examples
 visiting of your family
doctor
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 solution could save your life.
Secondly
Linking Words
, to be more productive and make your life
longer
Punctuation problem
longer,
show examples
 you need
always
Verb problem
to always
show examples
 test your blood.
Superfood
Fix the agreement mistake
Superfoods
show examples
 and
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of vitamins can really change your lifestyle.
For example
Linking Words
, you need to make
full
Correct article usage
a full
show examples
 check-up of your
health
Use synonyms
 twice a year.
Main
Correct article usage
The main
show examples
 reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 it, saving your time and money. Nowadays,
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 of visiting
Use synonyms
doctor
Correct article usage
a doctor
show examples
 is really high,
price
Correct article usage
the price
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
medecine
Correct your spelling
medicine
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 every year. So it is
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 solution to save funds and time. In conclusion, only
regualar
Correct your spelling
regular
check-up
Fix the agreement mistake
check-ups
show examples
 of your
health
Use synonyms
 and visiting your family
doctor
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a key
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
long
Correct article usage
a long
show examples
 and cool life.
regular
Fix capitalization
Regular
show examples
health
Use synonyms
 checks are a wise choice for most people, because
health
Use synonyms
 can change quickly and problems can be hidden
, some
Punctuation problem
. Some
show examples
 people may overdo tests, but targeted checks based on age and risk work best.

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structure
Make a clear start. Add a short intro that states your view and plan.
grammar
Use simple words. Check spellings: important, fell, disease.
content
Give one idea per paragraph. Explain how each idea helps your view.
content
Keep facts simple and true. Say what is common in health care: checkups help find bad things early.
content
You show a clear view against the idea.
structure
You use two reasons to support your view.
structure
There is a conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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