IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

With a growing work population one of the most pressing issues is that of feeding such a larger number of people. some people think that GM foods offer a viable solution to this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the contemporary world,
while
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 there is a steady growth in the population, the objective of supplying
people
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 with food is
one
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 of the most challenging issues in the world. A group of individuals are of the opinion that genetically modified
foods
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 are a successful option to ameliorate
this
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 problem. I firmly disagree with the latter
one
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, as GM
foods
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 trigger the risk of being infected by some popular diseases
such
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 as diabetes, cancer and others. On the
one
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 hand, genetically manipulated
products
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 are good for feeding the members of society, but they have incredibly harmful consequences on human health. Research shows that the time of cro as modified ripens 2 times earlier than the normal
one
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 does, as it is designed and contains various nutritional elements provided by
people
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.
However
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, all the demerits of GM
products
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 outweigh the merits.
Besides
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,
foods
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 cultivated with non-GMO seeds and an organic farming approach have healthier nutrition and bring sustainable agriculture.
Secondly
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, the nurturing methods of transgenic
foods
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 seem to shorten the
overall
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 length of human life.
For example
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, before the invention of GM food in society, the number of sick
people
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 , as the spread of well-known health issues like cancer, diabetes and others, was relatively slow.
Conversely
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, after the consumption of transgenic and non-organic
products
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, the number of infected
people
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 is experiencing a rise in a trend, correspondingly.
Moreover
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, as a significant number of diseases spread, the risk of
people
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 over the
age
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 of 35 and even under the
age
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 of 35 are more likely to be acquired diseases diminishes the probability of them to reach at the average
age
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 of 100. Current population , even at their young
age
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 of 20 or 25, are fighting against cancer.
To sum up
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,
while
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 considering the harmful effects of overpopulation, the consumption of GMO seeds and
products
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 remains a contentious issue
due to
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 their potentially serious impact on human health. I strongly advocate cultivating crops and plants through healthier and more sustainable methods.

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planning
Plan your answer with a clear view. State your main idea in the first paragraph.
structure
Organize ideas in order. Use one idea per paragraph and start with a topic sentence.
language
Use simple and exact words. Avoid long, tricky phrases.
evidence
Support your idea with real and simple facts or examples.
editing
Check grammar and punctuation. Use correct verb forms and plural.
task response
Clear personal position is stated in the essay.
coherence
Some relevant ideas about health and farming methods.
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