Nowadays, more and more people choose to do their shopping onlineinstead of going to physical stores. Why is this so? What are the disadvantages of this trend?

Nowadays
Punctuation problem
Nowadays,
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online shopping is one of the most popular
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
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of buying everything you need. Many physical stores were closed in
past
Correct article usage
the past
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few years. For
large
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a large
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group of people
odering
Correct your spelling
ordering
from the internet is more comfortable than
go
Wrong verb form
going
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to the store. There are a large number of benefits
online
Change preposition
to online
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shopping. I
this
Linking Words
essay, I will write about
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
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of it.
Firstly
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, a lot of people
loose
Use the right word
lose
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their workplaces in
a
Correct article usage
the
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case of closing real offline stores. In
this
Linking Words
situation
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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less taxes and many people become
unemloyed
Correct your spelling
unemployed
,
this
Linking Words
issue is not good for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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economics
Replace the word
economic
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rise
Check wording
growth
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. Another problem is for property owners. They do not know what to do with their private territory, as many of them got loans from the bank to build shopping
centers
Use the right word
centres
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. So
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
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buisness
Correct your spelling
business
has
also
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troubles in
this
Linking Words
case. By the
way
Add a comma
way,
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visiting
shopping
Correct article usage
a shopping
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center
Use the right word
centre
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is
good
Correct article usage
a good
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way to relax and spend time with your family. In conclusion, I
totally
Verb problem
am totally
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against
increase
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the increase
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of
Change preposition
in
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number
Correct article usage
the number
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of real stores and malls. I do not like online shopping at all. For me
visiting
Punctuation problem
, visiting
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store
Correct article usage
a store
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is more suitable and
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
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me the
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
of reality than searching
in
Change preposition
on
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the web for the things I need. Shift in consumer
behavior
Use the right word
behaviour
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: younger generations preferring digital interactions and the increase in trust in online payment systems.

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content
Add clear reasons for why people shop online, like save time, wide choice, and ease.
structure
Plan the essay. Use one part to give reasons, one to show problems, and one to finish with a short view.
tone
Keep to the task. Do not say you hate online shopping. Try to show a calm view and give both sides.
grammar
Fix small errors: 'odering' -> 'ordering', 'loose' -> 'lose', 'unemloyed' -> 'unemployed', 'go' -> 'going'.
coherence
Use linking words to join ideas: 'First', 'Next', 'However', 'But', 'In addition'.
content
Include an example for at least one point to show it in real life.
structure
The text has an intro and a conclusion.
content
Some idea about the need to relax and spend time with family.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-commerce
  • convenience
  • physical stores
  • retail therapy
  • consumer behavior
  • digital interactions
  • price comparison
  • product range
  • internet penetration
  • online payment systems
  • delivery logistics
  • carbon footprint
  • expedited shipping
  • local businesses
  • retail sector
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