The first graph below shows the number of train passengers in the city of Sydney (Australia) between 1995 and 2004. The second graph shows the target for trains to run on time compared to the percentage reaching this target. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The first graph below shows the number of train passengers in the city of Sydney (Australia) between 1995 and 2004. The second graph shows the target for trains to run on time compared to the percentage reaching this target. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The first graph below shows the number of train passengers in the city of Sydney (Australia) between 1995 and 2004. The second graph shows the target for trains to run on time compared to the percentage reaching this target. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The first
line
Use synonyms
graph
Use synonyms
reveals the
number
Use synonyms
of
passengers
Use synonyms
who took
trains
Use synonyms
in Sydney from 1995 to 2004. The second
line
Use synonyms
graph
Use synonyms
compares the
target
Use synonyms
of
punctuality
Use synonyms
for
trains
Use synonyms
to the proportion reaching the goal during the same period.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident from the first
line
Use synonyms
graph
Use synonyms
that the
number
Use synonyms
of train
passengers
Use synonyms
in Sydney showed an upward trend, increasing from approximately 250
million
Use synonyms
people in 1995 to nearly 280
million
Use synonyms
in 2004. From 1995 to 2001, there was a steady growth of train
passengers
Use synonyms
, which amounted to a maximum of 30
million
Use synonyms
passengers
Use synonyms
in 2001. In 2002,
However
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
of
passengers
Use synonyms
dropped to 280
million
Use synonyms
and remained relatively stable in 2003 and 2004, respectively. Turning to the second
line
Use synonyms
graph
Use synonyms
, we can see that the
target
Use synonyms
of being punctual for
trains
Use synonyms
in Sydney was around 93%.
Punctuality
Use synonyms
rate of
trains
Use synonyms
in 1999 and 2002 fulfilled the aim. By
comparison
Fix capitalization
Comparison
show examples
, percentages of
trains
Use synonyms
running on time in 1995, 1998, 2001 and 2003 were close ot the
target
Use synonyms
, standing at more than 90%.
However
Linking Words
, the years 1996, 1997 , and 2000 experienced a lower percentage, with 89%, 87% and 86% respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
, in 2004, the
punctuality
Use synonyms
rate of
trains
Use synonyms
was only 72%, which was far from the goal of 93% . In conclusion, the
number
Use synonyms
of train
passengers
Use synonyms
peaked in 2001. The
punctuality
Use synonyms
rate of
trains
Use synonyms
reached the
target
Use synonyms
in 1999 and 2002.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words line, graph, number, passengers, trains, target, punctuality, million with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the eighth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the ninth paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: