IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There has always been controversy regarding whether people should save
money
Use synonyms
 for their future. Many people argue that it is important to do so,
while
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 others hold opposing views.
This
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 essay will examine both perspectives before reaching a conclusion.
To begin
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 with, cash is essential for survival. Everything around us has monetary value. Without
money
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, people will not be able to afford their basic necessities,
such
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 as food, water, shelter, and clothing.
Thus
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, at least a small amount of cash should be saved for future and emergency purposes.
For instance
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, parents need to earn and save enough
money
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 for their children's education. They need to pay for schools and universities for education so that their children are qualified to find jobs and become financially independent.
Moreover
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, teens should
also
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 save some of their pocket
money
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.
This
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 teaches them to become more responsible and to know how to tackle financial situations, because there is always an opportunity cost. If youngsters know how to spend and save cash wisely at a young age, they will be more confident in handling uncertainties and will learn financial discipline.
In contrast
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, poor families living in poverty may find it challenging to save enough for the next few years, as they struggle to make ends meet.
This
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 means that they will focus more on the present than on their uncertain future. In a nutshell,
while
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 it may be tough for some individuals to save, it is significant to save at least a small amount each time to ensure that there is an adequate amount of
money
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 in case of emergencies or unexpected scenarios,
such
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 as job losses or health issues. The long-term benefits of saving outweigh the difficulties.

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task
State your view in the intro and keep it in all parts.
content
Give more detail to your examples so the ideas feel real.
coherence
Use more linking words to show how ideas go from one idea to the next.
language
Check grammar and use simple, direct sentences.
content
Clear idea that saving is good.
structure
Basic but clear structure with intro, body and end.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
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