IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many countries believe that hosting international sporting events like Olympics or World Cup is a great idea. Others think it is a huge mistake. Give the adaavantages and disadvantages of hosting international sporting events.

Some people believe
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 that to perform international
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
events
Use synonyms
 in their
countries
Use synonyms
like
Punctuation problem
, like
show examples
Correct article usage
the Olimpic
show examples
Olimpic
Use the right word
Olympic Games
show examples
games
Use synonyms
 or
Use synonyms
World
Correct article usage
the World
show examples
Cup
Punctuation problem
Cup,
show examples
 is a great idea,
Correct word choice
while other
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
another
show examples
 group of citizens
think
Correct subject-verb agreement
thinks
show examples
 that it is
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 mistake. Both points of view have advantages and disadvantages. I
this
Linking Words
 essay
I
Punctuation problem
, I
show examples
will try to provide pros and cons of
Use synonyms
world famous
Use the right word
world-famous
show examples
 athletic
events
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
 reason for
countries
Use synonyms
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 host
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these sports
show examples
sport
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
 is
Correct article usage
an increse
show examples
increse
Correct your spelling
increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their
econimic
Correct your spelling
economy
,
many
Correct word choice
as many
show examples
 people
all
Change preposition
from all
show examples
 around the
world
Use synonyms
 come to
this
Linking Words
 event. Tourism is one of the sectors. During the days of
games
Use synonyms
, usually all hotels, restaurants and places of interest are fully booked. All kinds of
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
 in
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
 get more money from tourists and guests. So
this
Linking Words
 is
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
 advantage of hostage
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
any kind of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
games
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, local residents of places where
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
events
Use synonyms
 could be performed
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
fell
Use the right word
felt
show examples
 upset and stressed.
They
Correct pronoun usage
Their
show examples
 routine life
change
Correct subject-verb agreement
changes
show examples
 a lot.
For example
Linking Words
, terrible traffic and
overcroweded
Correct your spelling
overcrowded
 cities and towns would make them unhappy and
tied
Use the right word
tired
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
,
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 of living
increase
Fix the agreement mistake
increases
show examples
 during international
events
Use synonyms
, because prices for
every thing
Use the right word
everything
show examples
 and
every where
Use the right word
everywhere
show examples
uprise in
Replace the word
rise
show examples
 two or three times more.
Thats
Use the right word
That's
show examples
 why for
citizents
Correct your spelling
citizens
 any international event would be
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
 issue.
To sum up
Linking Words
, discussions about hosting international
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
games
Use synonyms
 in their
countries
Use synonyms
, like
Correct article usage
the Olimpic
show examples
Olimpic
Use the right word
Olympic Games
show examples
games
Use synonyms
 or
Use synonyms
World
Correct article usage
the World
show examples
 Cup
Linking Words
last
Punctuation problem
, last
show examples
 for many years. Both opponents have
diffrent
Correct your spelling
different
view
Fix the agreement mistake
views
show examples
 about
this
Linking Words
 problem. I think there are more reasons for the
countries
Use synonyms
 to be a place of
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
events
Use synonyms
,
due to
Linking Words
increasing
Replace the word
the increase
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their economy and to be more famous in the
world
Use synonyms
.

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language
Fix spelling and grammar. Use the right word form and spelling, for example 'Olympic' not 'Olimpic', 'increase' not 'uprise'.
structure
Use one idea in each paragraph and start with a clear sentence about that idea. Use easy link words like 'first', 'also', 'but', 'however'.
content
Give a bit more detail for each point. Add one or two clear example for the point you make.
structure
The plan is clear: intro, body, and conclusion.
content
The writer tries to look at both sides and adds their view.
content
There are real facts used, like people travel and a rise in prices.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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