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Writing Samples
Band 6

The line graph compares the number of goods transported to the UK by four various modes of transportation in the years 1974 to 2002. Data are expressed in million of tonnes.

The line graph compares the number of goods transported to the UK by four various modes of transportation in the years 1974 to 2002. Data are expressed in million of tonnes.
The line graph illustrates the amount of
goods
Use synonyms
 that have been delivered to the UK in four different ways between 1974 and 2002.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 the highest number of merchandise has been delivered by road.
While
Linking Words
, pipeline was the least usable
transportation
Use synonyms
 system for the
goods
Use synonyms
. Interestingly,
transportation
Use synonyms
 by water was the only way that
lost
Verb problem
transport
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 the
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
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 of
goods
Use synonyms
 over the given period. In 1974, the most popular way of
transportation
Use synonyms
 was by road, which, transported almost 70 million tons of
goods
Use synonyms
, and by 2002 increased
almost to
Correct word order
to almost
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 100.
Also
Linking Words
, water and rail
transportation
Use synonyms
 systems delivered
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 almost the same amount of
goods
Use synonyms
 at the beginning of the period.
However
Linking Words
, after 4 years, the situation changed. The number of
goods
Use synonyms
 that were transported by water overtook the railway
transportation
Use synonyms
, and in 1983 the difference between them reached approximately
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 twice. Compared to other ways,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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transportation
Use synonyms
 by pipeline was negligible in 1974. Despite that, it increased approximately 10 times and reached 20 million tons by 2002.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words goods, transportation with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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