IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In some sountries owing a home rather then renting one is very important for people. Why might be this case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

It is believed that some
people
Use synonyms
 tend to buy an apartment
instead
Linking Words
 of renting one.
This
Linking Words
 idea is very spread
especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
show examples
between
Change preposition
among
show examples
 young
people
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 .In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 idea is active because I can save my
money
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 and stay in the same home all my
life
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. First and foremost, most
people
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 prefer to own an apartment because they want to save the
money
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 that they give to the owner of their home
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 they buy
Correct article usage
a privat
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privat
Correct your spelling
private
 apartment
insted
Correct your spelling
instead
 of giving the
mony
Correct your spelling
money
 to
other
Fix the agreement mistake
another
show examples
 person. Another reason is that they need to stay in the same
house
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 and get older with it
due to
Linking Words
 it has all their memory
over
Change preposition
of
show examples
 their
life
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 .
For example
Linking Words
, my
grand father
Use the right word
grandfather
show examples
 still lives in the same
house
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 because he
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
rememberd
Correct your spelling
remembered
 his family ,
also
Linking Words
 when he was young ,he had saved his
money
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 and bought it.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
people
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 tend to rent a flat because they need to invest their
money
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 in another sector ,or they hate routine
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 they like to change their
place
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 in everytime they need .That means ,they invest the
money
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 in the trade so their
money
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 will get twice
instead
Linking Words
 of
save
Wrong verb form
saving
show examples
 it
in buying
Change preposition
to buy
show examples
 a
house
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
 , they like to change their
life
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 to another
place
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that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 they find a new job and relationships .
For instance
Linking Words
, my friend hates routine
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 she has changed her job and flat to another country
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 she wants to invest her
money
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 in the
coumpany
Correct your spelling
company
that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 she
work
Correct subject-verb agreement
works
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. In conclusion,some
people
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 prefer to have a
house
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 to keep
ther
Correct your spelling
their
money
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 and
place
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 others need to change their
life
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 to another
place
Use synonyms
Rephrase
where that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
find
Verb problem
can find
show examples
 new
life
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.

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planning
Plan your essay first. Write a short view, then add two or three ideas with one example for each.
coherence
Use small linking words like and, but, so, also to connect ideas.
development
Give one clear example for each idea and explain why it shows your point.
grammar
Check spelling and grammar to make your meaning clear.
structure
Finish with a short ending that restates your view and the main points.
task response
You show a clear view on the topic.
coherence
You give real life examples from family life to explain your point.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • own
  • rent
  • home
  • house
  • buy
  • save
  • saving
  • future
  • family
  • kids
  • school
  • security
  • stability
  • debt
  • loan
  • cost
  • price
  • rise
  • mobility
  • move
  • benefit
  • risk
  • positive
  • negative
  • policy
  • government
  • tax
  • income
  • job
  • culture
  • status
  • wealth
  • home ownership
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