IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is important for everyone, including young
people
Use synonyms
, to save
money
Use synonyms
 for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement?
Money
Use synonyms
 is ımportant for everything,
Money
Use synonyms
 can buy
evertying
Correct your spelling
everything
 even
pover
Correct your spelling
poverty
.
Use synonyms
Money
Check wording
Money's
show examples
 meaning is future , freedom , power…. So let's talk about why
people
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 save
Money
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 ?
Linking Words
Firstly
Punctuation problem
Firstly,
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 we should know the ages of the
people
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. Teen want
money
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 because they want
some
Verb problem
to have some
show examples
 fun to hang out with
girlfriend
Correct pronoun usage
their girlfriend
show examples
 and friends , buy some digital game , go
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 holiday , go to make extreme sports , to travel the world
they
Punctuation problem
. They
show examples
 can do
evertyhing
Correct your spelling
everything
 with
money
Use synonyms
 for themself . Young
people
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 want
money
Use synonyms
 for weeding,
make
Verb problem
to make
show examples
 a family ,
do
Verb problem
to do
show examples
 a job ,
Verb problem
to
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improve
theirself
Use the right word
themselves
show examples
 so they can spend
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to get
succes
Correct your spelling
success
. The
middleaged
Use the right word
middle-aged
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 want
money
Use synonyms
 for their family
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 these
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 have to take care
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
family
Punctuation problem
family,
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 they have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
they
Punctuation problem
, they
show examples
 have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parents
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 if they are working so
Replace the word
hard
show examples
hardly
Punctuation problem
hardly,
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 they want
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
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 have a holiday
Punctuation problem
, for
show examples
for a resting
Wrong verb form
to rest
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 and
absouletly
Correct your spelling
absolutely
 they think their
children
Check wording
children's
show examples
 education and future
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 they have to save
money
Use synonyms
 for these reasons .
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
last
Linking Words
 age the old
people
Use synonyms
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
want
money
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 for their
healty
Correct your spelling
health
, they want
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to spend
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
less time with their family , to go
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 holiday to travel the world.
Linking Words
Finally
Add a comma
Finally,
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 every age has
an
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 own reasons the save
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
Use synonyms
.
Money
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effect
Use the right word
affects
show examples
evertying
Correct your spelling
everything
if
Punctuation problem
. If
show examples
 you
havent
Correct your spelling
haven't
 got any
money
Use synonyms
it
Punctuation problem
, it
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 can push you to crime
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
dont
Correct your spelling
Don't
 forget
many
Correct word choice
that many
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 commit crime because they are poor
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 they want
earn
Verb problem
to earn
show examples
money
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
easy
Correct article usage
an easy
show examples
 way and they
make
Verb problem
commit
show examples
 a crime
;
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 They sell
drug
Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
show examples
,they rob
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
houses ,banks, every place they
try
Verb problem
can try
show examples
 to rob if
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
possible . So if you have
Use synonyms
money
Punctuation problem
money,
show examples
 you
con
Use the right word
can
show examples
 live honorable and you
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 have to do bad things . So
money
Use synonyms
 can solve and fix
evertying
Correct your spelling
everything
 and it makes you good .

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task
Make your view clear at the top. Say if you agree or not with the idea.
structure
Use a plan. Put an intro, 2 or 3 main ideas, and a short end.
content
Give simple, real examples. Explain how saving helps in life.
language
Check spelling and form. Fix common words like 'evertying' and 'healhty'.
content
The try to explain why people save money.
structure
You compare needs of different age groups.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
What to do next:
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