IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013

The chart shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013
This
Linking Words
 chart compares the frequency of eating fast
food
Use synonyms
 in the USA's
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
 in different 3
years
Use synonyms
, 2003, 2006 and 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that choosing fast
food
Use synonyms
 as a meal, once a
week
Use synonyms
 and once or twice a
Use synonyms
month
Punctuation problem
month,
show examples
 was really popular among Americans. The most percentage of people ate fast
food
Use synonyms
 in the USA once a
week
Use synonyms
 and once or twice a
month
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
, it was reported that, demanding for eating fast
food
Use synonyms
 once a
week
Use synonyms
 in 2003, 2006 and 2013 was 31%, 32% and 27%, respectively.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the frequency of eating
this
Linking Words
 kind of
food
Use synonyms
 once or twice a
month
Use synonyms
 was 30% ,25% and more than 30% in those following
years
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
using
Check wording
people using
show examples
 fast
food
Use synonyms
 several times a
week
Use synonyms
 and a few times a year was noted to be from 12% to 20%,
among
Change preposition
over
show examples
 three
years
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, considering fast
food
Use synonyms
 as an everyday dish was less than other categories in three
years
Use synonyms
, which was under 5%.
Likewise
Linking Words
, almost 5% of the individuals in that country did not prefer to use
this
Linking Words
 type of
food
Use synonyms
. All in all,
it is clear that
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 consuming fast
food
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
once a
week
Use synonyms
 and once or twice a
month
Use synonyms
 was very common and trendy
in
Change preposition
among
show examples
America's
Check wording
America
show examples
 residents.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words food, years, week, month with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fast food consumption
  • Frequency
  • Dining trends
  • Demographic factors
  • Peak periods
  • Downward/upward trend
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Economic impact
  • Health implications
  • Convenience foods
  • Eating habits
  • Statistical evidence
  • Year-over-year comparison
  • Fluctuation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: