IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You applied for a job at a company but haven't received a response yet. Write a letter to the HR department to inquire about the status of your application.

#job #company #haven #hr #department #status #application
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Dear Sir, I hope
this
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 letter finds you well.My name is Daisy and I am writing to formally request you about the status of my application. I have carefully considered the need for a job,and after thorough consideration,I believe that you will answer my application. I understand that
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 may not be easy because you do not only have
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 issue, but so many, and I am open to discussing ways to address these issues collaboratively. I am confident that by doing so we both can benefit from its results, and I believe that it will not be much of a problem, and it would have a positive impact on our progress. Thank you for taking the time to review my request. I am more than willing to provide any additional information or clarification needed. I look forward to the possibility of fulfilling my request and appreciate your attention to
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 matter. Yours faithfully, Daisy
Submitted by Teo Halimov on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure to have a clear and focused main idea for each paragraph to enhance cohesion.
task achievement
Clarify the purpose of your letter more directly. State explicitly that you're inquiring about the application status to achieve a complete task response.
coherence cohesion
The closing of your letter is polite and appropriate for professional correspondence.
task achievement
The tone of your writing is generally suitable for a business letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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