IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In some countries,owning a home rather than renting one is very importent for people. Why might this be case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
There is no denying the fact that importance of owning a
home
Use synonyms
 for many
people
Use synonyms
 and essential thing.
While
Linking Words
 it is commonly held
belf
Correct your spelling
belief
 that many individuals like to
owning
Wrong verb form
own
show examples
 a
home
Use synonyms
 rather than
renting
Replace the word
rent
show examples
. There is
also
Linking Words
 an argument
opposes
Correct pronoun usage
that opposes
show examples
 it.
This
Linking Words
essey
Correct your spelling
essay
 will
discus
Use the right word
discuss
show examples
 the
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
 and
negtive ponits
Correct your spelling
negative points
 and
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 will express my opinion.
Body paragraph 1
on
Fix capitalization
On
show examples
 one hand, many
people
Use synonyms
 believe that owning a
home
Use synonyms
 is essential for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 for many reasons.
by
Change preposition
In
show examples
 other
word
Fix the agreement mistake
words
show examples
, owning a
home
Use synonyms
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is
dream
Correct article usage
a dream
show examples
 for every family to feel safe and to make sure about their kids
after
Change preposition
in
show examples
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
time
Check wording
term
show examples
.
Linking Words
in
Fix capitalization
In
show examples
 addition, many family try to
owning
Wrong verb form
own
show examples
 a
home
Use synonyms
 and
puy
Use the right word
pay
show examples
 more money from their income only to get a
home
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Fix capitalization
Also
show examples
also
Add a comma
also,
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that owning a
home
Use synonyms
 is
batter
Use the right word
better
show examples
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 if
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
puy
Use the right word
buy
show examples
 they
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
 their many
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is
opposes
Wrong verb form
opposed
show examples
 the
rent
Replace the word
renting
show examples
.
Body paragraph 2
on
Fix capitalization
On
show examples
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, many family think
to
Change preposition
that
show examples
investment
Replace the word
investing
show examples
 their
many
Fix the agreement mistake
much
show examples
 better than
own
Wrong verb form
owning
show examples
 a
home
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
 possible to say that
investment
Replace the word
investing
show examples
 money in
any things
Use the right word
anything
show examples
 can make to person other
income
Punctuation problem
income,
show examples
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is
Verb problem
can
show examples
 lead to
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
 the income
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 the person can puy a
home
Use synonyms
 in
Correct article usage
a confortable
show examples
confortable
Correct your spelling
comfortable
 way without any pressure.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in some countries the price of
Use synonyms
home
Correct article usage
a home
show examples
 is too high
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
people
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
tend to rent
Correct article usage
a hime
show examples
hime
Correct your spelling
home
 until they
Wrong verb form
retire
show examples
retired
Punctuation problem
retired,
show examples
than
Use the right word
then
show examples
 they
going
Wrong verb form
go
show examples
 to
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
 to find less price.
Conclusion
In
conculsion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, not easy to
answers
Wrong verb form
answer
show examples
this
Linking Words
 question, but
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
blelieve
Correct your spelling
believe
 that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
owing
Use the right word
owning
show examples
 a
home
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 more
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
 things
Punctuation problem
. For
show examples
for instance
Linking Words
,
safe
Replace the word
saving
show examples
your money in
Correct word order
money in your
show examples
home
Use synonyms
 for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 is
beeter
Correct your spelling
better
 than
rent
Replace the word
renting
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task response
Plan first. Write a short plan. Then make two clear paragraphs. End with a short view.
Coherence and cohesion
Make one main idea in each paragraph. Use linking words like also, but, so, however. Use simple words and clear order.
content
The writer starts to talk about both sides and gives a view.
content
There is a final line that shows the writer has an own view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: