IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In many developing countries,there is a problem with declining qaulity of air and water from both indsutry and construction. What measures could be taken to prevent this.

There is no denying the fact that the decline in the quality of
air
Use synonyms
 and
water
Use synonyms
 has become a major concern in many developing countries.
This
Linking Words
 issue has caused several problems in society.
Although
Linking Words
 these problems are serious, I believe they can be solved;
this
Linking Words
 is because governments can implement strict regulations, and it
also
Linking Words
 depends on public awareness and sustainable practices.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, one serious problem is the emission of toxic gases from factories, and it
also
Linking Words
 includes the discharge of untreated waste into rivers.
In other words
Linking Words
, industrial activities pollute both the
air
Use synonyms
 we breathe and the
water
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 we drink.
For example
Linking Words
, in several Asian countries, rapid construction projects have contributed to high levels of smog and contaminated
water
Use synonyms
 supplies.
Moreover
Linking Words
, poor enforcement of environmental laws worsens the situation. In terms of solutions, governments should enforce stricter environmental regulations, and they
also
Linking Words
 need to invest in eco-friendly technologies. Indeed, heavy industries must be required to use filters and treatment plants before releasing waste.
For instance
Linking Words
, countries that adopted green construction standards witnessed significant improvements in
air
Use synonyms
 quality.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, raising public awareness through education campaigns can encourage individuals to recycle and reduce pollution. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 the decline in
air
Use synonyms
 and
water
Use synonyms
 quality has caused several problems, I believe there are practical solutions;
therefore
Linking Words
, governments should take strong action
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 citizens must cooperate.
This
Linking Words
 combined effort will ensure a cleaner environment and a healthier future for all.

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overall
Your ideas are clear and you give steps to fix a bad air and water problem. To raise score, add more direct links between your ideas and show how each step will work.
coherence
Improve flow by making each paragraph focused on one main idea and use linking words to move from one idea to the next.
content
Give more exact steps and rules, such as limits on smoke, waste water rules, and how to check they are followed. Mention who will enforce them.
language
Use short, plain sentences. Keep the words simple and easy to read.
idea
You give a clear plan that both government and people have a role.
structure
You use examples to show your point.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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