Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

While
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it is commonly thought that traffic
accidents
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can be controlled by strict punishments,
others
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believe that
road
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safety is what
people
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need to focus on. I’m going to discuss these opposing points of view. In my opinion, I agree with both statements. On the one hand, it is argued that
people
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can minimise the number of traffic
accidents
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by applying high penalties or suspending the driver’s license for a period. The main reason is that the offences are now detected by surveillance cameras, so drivers would be more careful in driving on the roads, which
then
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lowers the risk of
accidents
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. It is
also
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possible to say that the confinement of driver’s licenses is one of the solutions which is applied to bring down many cases.
For instance
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, the fines for speeding and crossing traffic lights are announced as significant amounts since they are the main reasons leading to
road
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accidents
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. Another reason is that without a license,
people
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would not be able to drive any vehicles.
On the other hand
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, it is strongly believed by
others
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that
people
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should be well educated about
road
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safety.
People
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often have
this
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opinion because understanding the importance of driving safely not only protects us but
also
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ensures that it does not affect
others
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. A second point is that education is the best way to transfer knowledge to our next generation about
this
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situation. In conclusion, it is commonly thought that applying punishments is a way to bring down accident cases; meanwhile,
others
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assume that other solutions can be used to develop
road
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safety. Personally, I tend to believe that both aspects must be considered to improve
this
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situation, as
people
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will not remember without being punished and will not know how to drive safely without fully understanding the laws and regulations.

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task response
Task response: You talk about both sides and give your view. To be stronger, add clear and full reason and a real example for each view.
task response
Task response: State your view in the intro and finish with a clear end that repeats your view and sums up the points.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Start each paragraph with a main idea and keep to one idea per paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Use brighter link words to join ideas, like first, next, and also, but, so, however.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Make sure each sentence connects to the sentence before it.
structure
The essay has a clear plan: intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
content
It shows both sides and a view.
coherence
It uses 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to mark the view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • deterrent
  • repeat offenses
  • infrastructure improvements
  • public awareness campaigns
  • reckless driving
  • traffic management technologies
  • intelligent traffic lights
  • speed cameras
  • public transportation
  • minimize
  • enhance safety
  • allocate funds
  • road signs
  • road safety
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