IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think history has little to teach us, but others think that studying the past can help us better understand the present and predict the future. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
believe that
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
not
Verb problem
does not
show examples
 teach us
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
much
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
; however
show examples
however
Punctuation problem
however,
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 some
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 think that
study
Replace the word
studying
show examples
 ancient times can be helpful in nowadays and upcoming
time
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 my opinion
learning
Punctuation problem
, learning
show examples
previous
Change preposition
from previous
show examples
era
Fix the agreement mistake
eras
show examples
 may be helpful for better for coming soon
time
Use synonyms
 On one side of the argument there are the people who hold the opinion that learning bygone days effect little on us the most compelling reason for holding
this
Linking Words
 view is that we live in the modern era where we have Ai, new technology, modern climate predicting devices may helpful to prevent from dangerous situation
as a result
Linking Words
 we are less fearful than our ancestors
furthermore
Linking Words
, studying olden days not be useful in the searching jobs and for running house because it is only a waste of
time
Use synonyms
 Despite the above argument, I am of the view that
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 on past
helping
Wrong verb form
helps
show examples
 in our best
future
Use synonyms
I
Punctuation problem
. I
show examples
explain it
firstly
Linking Words
, it
realize
Use the right word
realise
show examples
 our
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
show examples
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 we have a lot of opportunities for improvement in the
future
Use synonyms
because
Punctuation problem
, because
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ignorance
Punctuation problem
ignorance,
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 we all
are done
Verb problem
make
show examples
some
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
mistakes
another
Punctuation problem
. Another
show examples
 reason is that maturity automatically
develop
Correct subject-verb agreement
develops
show examples
 in
us
Punctuation problem
us,
show examples
an
Use the right word
and
show examples
 for the
Use synonyms
future
Punctuation problem
future,
show examples
 we
forgot
Wrong verb form
should forget
show examples
such
Linking Words
 type of mistakes In conclusion, studying
Use synonyms
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
teach
Correct subject-verb agreement
teaches
show examples
 us little because there was not
mush
Use the right word
much
show examples
 technology present in past
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
also
Linking Words
 it is
an
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 waste of
Use synonyms
time
Punctuation problem
time,
show examples
whereas
Linking Words
 if we study
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
past
Punctuation problem
past,
show examples
 they
helping
Wrong verb form
help
show examples
 to improve
Use synonyms
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 because a lot of
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
show examples
 we all
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
 in the foolishness and we secure a chance to improve
upcoming
Correct article usage
the upcoming
show examples
time
Use synonyms
in
Punctuation problem
. In
show examples
 my
suggestion
Check wording
opinion
show examples
school
Punctuation problem
, school
show examples
 may
helpful
Verb problem
be helpful
show examples
 for motivating young

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grammar
Fix the grammar and use simple forms. For example, write 'Some people think history can teach us much' instead of 'Some are believe that past not teach us more much'.
organization
Make a clear plan: short intro, two body parts, short end. Put one idea in each sentence. Use linking words to show how ideas are tied.
lexical resource
Use easy words only and be exact. Do not use long or hard words. Use facts or small examples to back ideas.
content
Give one or two good reasons in each side and add a small example from real life or class to show your point.
content
The writer tries to discuss both sides and gives an opinion.
structure
There are some linking words like 'On one side' and 'Despite' that show some sense of flow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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