Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time being active or creative. What is the reason for this? What measures should be taken to encourage children to be more active?

There is no denying the fact that these days
technology
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, technology
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and social media play a crucial role in our lives, especially for
kids
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.
This
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essay will discuss what caused these issues and what methods we can take to motivate
kids
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to do more activities.
To begin
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with, there are many reasons
children
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stay at home most of the time and do nothing.
Firstly
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, recently, parents have started being busy most of the day.
In other words
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, parents allow their
kids
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to watch television and give them mobiles to play video games, to keep the
children
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away from them, and not disturb them.
In addition
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, advertisements and social media have an effect on
kids
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.
For example
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, if the
kids
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have a fan and he promotes a video game,
children
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will be influenced immediately and start playing that video game. In terms of solutions, the family can set a competition. It is
also
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possible to say that parent can make their
kids
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do some activities throughout the day to stay energetic and give prizes to encourage them.
Moreover
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, families can set a time limit of usage
smartphones
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apply
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.
For instance
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, parents can divide
kids
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’ time into one hour of using smartphones and three hours to do various activities. In conclusion, there are many factors
of
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in
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using smartphones or watching television, especially in recent years. Most of our needs depend on technologies, so it is hard to avoid
this
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issue. It is
also
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true that we can solve these problems in various ways, whether by making
children
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play with their friends in the park or engaging them in courses that reflect on their skills and improve them.

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planning
Plan your answer. Start with a clear view of the two parts: causes and ways to help. State them in the intro and expand in body paragraphs.
coherence
Use link words to connect ideas (because, also, but, then). This makes the text easy to follow.
content
Give more detail and simple examples. For example, suggest a daily play time in a park or a family walk after meals.
grammar
Check grammar and keep sentences short. Break long ideas into smaller sentences to avoid mistakes.
structure
The essay has an introduction and a conclusion.
content
Ideas of causes and solutions are clear enough for a reader to see.
style
Language is simple and easy to read.
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