IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Writing test Drug abuse is an increasing problem in modern times. Discuss some reasons behind this and suggest ways it can be hindered

Nowadays, consumption of
drugs
Use synonyms
 is
inclining
Verb problem
increasing
show examples
 and most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
been
Verb problem
become
show examples
 addicted
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will examine some of the major reasons behind
this
Linking Words
 growing concern and suggest
possible
Correct article usage
a possible
show examples
 solution to mitigate its spread.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are
number
Correct article usage
a number
show examples
 of causes that influence the usage of narcotics.
Linking Words
This first
Correct determiner usage
First
show examples
 and foremost is peer pressure. Because there are many young individuals who try these things because of the encouragement of their friends
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 once they try
then
Linking Words
 they
used
Verb problem
get used
show examples
 to it.
For instance
Linking Words
, in many countries, children are addicted to
this
Linking Words
 because they
indulge
Wrong verb form
are influenced
show examples
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 bad companies
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 force them to do
this
Linking Words
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, social media is
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
 main reason that
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 towards
drug
Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, there are many celebrities who
performing
Wrong verb form
perform
show examples
 in ads
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 illicit substances
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 when
people
Use synonyms
 watch those advertisements
then
Linking Words
 they
motivate
Wrong verb form
are motivated
show examples
 to try those harmful substances. There are some solutions that
assist to
Verb problem
help
show examples
 get rid
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
drugs
Use synonyms
.
School
Fix the agreement mistake
Schools
show examples
 and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should
organize
Use the right word
organise
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
camps in which
people
Use synonyms
 can
know
Verb problem
learn
show examples
 how
hatmful
Correct your spelling
harmful
 these
drugs
Use synonyms
 for them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, authorities should prohibit
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ads
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which they promote harmful narcotics. These
meathods
Correct your spelling
methods
 may help to reduce the usage of
drugs
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 peer pressure and advertisements
influencing
Wrong verb form
influence
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to use
drugs
Use synonyms
. Yet, with proper solutions like camps and banning the advertisement of narcotics can be useful to hinder its spread.

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content
Main ideas exist but are not fully explored. Add more facts or steps to show full plan.
coherence
Use one clear idea per paragraph and connect them with simple links.
grammar
Fix grammar and spelling errors, especially articles, plurals, and verb forms.
structure
Provide a stronger conclusion that restates the main points clearly.
style
Use plain words and short sentences to keep the flow easy.
content
The essay tries to discuss causes and a solution.
structure
Intro and conclusion are present.
coherence
Connector words like 'To begin with' and 'Additionally' show basic cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • drug
  • drug use
  • problem
  • reason
  • cause
  • effect
  • harming
  • health
  • life
  • work
  • study
  • help
  • care
  • support
  • solution
  • prevent
  • prevention
  • education
  • school
  • family
  • home
  • peer
  • pressure
  • stress
  • money
  • policy
  • law
  • crime
  • access
  • choice
  • change
  • hope
  • opportunity
  • treatment
  • rehab
  • recovery
  • community
  • clinic
  • service
  • line
  • program
  • work
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