IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

“Some people think it is better to have many short holidays during the year. Others believe it would be beneficial to have fewer, longer vacations.” Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Rencently
Correct your spelling
Recently
, whether it is more
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 to enjoy plenty of short vacations all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
year
or
Rephrase
round or
show examples
 to have fewer but longer
holidays
Use synonyms
 has been a
hated
Use the right word
heated
show examples
 discussion.
From
Change preposition
In
show examples
 my opinion, we can be more
relaxing
Correct word choice
relaxed
show examples
 if we have a lot of
mini
Use the right word
mini-holidays
show examples
holidays
Use synonyms
 during the year. There is no doubt that there are some advantages to
enjoy
Wrong verb form
enjoying
show examples
 long vacations.
For example
Linking Words
, individuals can
take
Use the right word
make
show examples
 the most
use
Check wording
apply
show examples
of
this
Linking Words
 long free time to rest efficiently. What's more, it is
also
Linking Words
 a good time to travel with their family or friends to a
far
Correct word choice
faraway
show examples
 area.
However
Linking Words
, more benefits can be shown if we have
Correct article usage
a numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of short
holidays
Use synonyms
. To start with, citizens can have instant
braek
Correct your spelling
break
 every week which can recharge
themsevlves
Correct your spelling
themselves
 to a large extent.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they can have more energy to go back to deal with their tasks or assignments.
Besides
Linking Words
, people can be more excited and
expected
Wrong verb form
expect
show examples
 to have their short
holidays
Use synonyms
. And
as a result
Linking Words
, they will be active and passionate
to
Change preposition
about
show examples
 life.
Last
Linking Words
 but not
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
least, for some adults, having many short
holidays
Use synonyms
 can allow them to
accompanying
Wrong verb form
accompany
show examples
 their kids more frequently
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is
also
Linking Words
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 to family harmony and the growth of children. In
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
conclusion, it is better to have more short vacations in people's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.

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grammar
Fix basic grammar and spelling: In my opinion, not 'From my opinion'; use proper subject-verb forms and consistent tense.
structure
Make a clear intro that states the topic, the two views, and your opinion; end with a concise thesis.
structure
Arrange three clear paragraphs: one for each view with a short example, and a conclusion restating your view.
coherence
Use simple linking words to connect ideas (and, but, also, however, therefore). Avoid long run-on sentences.
content
Provide more specific examples, even simple ones, to back up points (family trips, work stress, planning holidays).
lexical
Keep vocabulary simple and accurate; avoid invented words; proofread for common mistakes.
content
The writer states an opinion and tries to discuss both views.
coherence
There are attempts to use linking phrases to show contrast.
structure
There is a clear conclusion that restates the opinion.
content
There is some evidence of balance by mentioning both sides.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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