Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Nowadays,
due to
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the rapid increase in technology,
people
Use synonyms
have different attitudes towards their lifestyle choices. Some individuals prefer to continue
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
in the same way to avoid any
further
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changes in their
living-style
Use the right word
lifestyle
show examples
Linking Words
while
Punctuation problem
, while
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others prefer that
change
Use synonyms
is necessary and beneficial for life. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both of my views and provide my personal opinion. On the one hand, there
are
Verb problem
is are
show examples
majority who always value stability and routine as compared to
change
Use synonyms
. These
people
Use synonyms
believe that
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
in one place or job helps them to ensure security and
peaceful
Correct article usage
a peaceful
show examples
mind.
For example
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, in many Asian countries, especially in India, Pakistan, China and others,
people
Use synonyms
love government jobs, which are highly desirable and beneficial for them because of the long-term stability, allowance and pension after
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
retirement. Folks
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
these positions never try to move or to gain new opportunities
due to
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the fear of losing credibility and security.
Additionally
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, these permanent facilities focus on living a balanced and healthy
life-style
Use the right word
lifestyle
show examples
without any stress and
permits
Correct subject-verb agreement
permit
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these
Correct pronoun usage
them
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to spend quality time with their families
especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
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on weekends, long-term vacations and after post-retirement
respectively
Rephrase
apply
show examples
.
Besides
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this
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, many
people
Use synonyms
argue that
change
Use synonyms
is the key part of both personal and professional growth. Exploring novel opportunities allows
persons
Check wording
people
show examples
to boost their knowledge and encourage modern challenges.
For instance
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,
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
the past few years,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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of students
prefer
Wrong verb form
have preferred
show examples
to apply abroad for various scholarships, which not only enhance their educational career but
also
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opens
Correct subject-verb agreement
open
show examples
up opportunities for better income
along with
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the permanent residential facilities.
Similarly
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, as compared to government sectors, these exploration allows the student and every young person to learn new skills.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
my perspective,
although
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staying on one job has
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
limited benefits,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
in
this
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modernization
Use the right word
modernisation
show examples
Use synonyms
change
Punctuation problem
, change
show examples
is essential as compared to traditional.
Moreover
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, a balanced approach is best to maintain
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
security when necessary
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
also
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try to focus on
chang
Use the right word
change
show examples
when
position
Correct article usage
a position
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announced
Verb problem
is announced
show examples
. All in all,
while
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some argue that to live in a similar way to avoid risks,
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while
Change preposition
apply
show examples
others oppose it and welcome the
change
Use synonyms
to grow stronger. I strongly believe that
change
Use synonyms
is necessary to achieve personal goals and to remain
focus
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
in today’s
rapid
Replace the word
rapidly
show examples
changing world.

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structure
Plan the essay with one idea per paragraph and a clear end.
coherence
Make links between ideas. Use words like also, but, for example to tie thoughts.
examples
Give exact examples that fit the idea and explain why they show your point.
grammar
Check grammar and keep short, simple sentences so meaning is clear.
task response
You discuss both views and give your own view.
structure
There is a basic plan with intro, body, and conclusion.
content
Some ideas are clear, and your use of examples shows you can think.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • stagnation
  • routine
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • specialization
  • innate
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • fast-paced
  • new horizons
  • equilibrium
  • progress
  • dynamic
  • transformation
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