Many students do part-time work while they are studying. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

It is argued that the majority of

students

Use synonyms

are working part-time jobs

while

Linking Words

they are studying.

Although

Linking Words

it may distract them from doing their assignment and getting a good amount of sleep hours, I strongly believe that

part-time

Correct article usage

a part-time

show examples

job for

students

Use synonyms

can elevate their confidence and help increase their income.

Thus

Linking Words

, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. One of the main advantages of working

part time

Use the right word

part-time

show examples

jobs for

students

Use synonyms

is to increase their income , which can aid in payments of the educational essentials

such

Linking Words

as books , bags and even school fees.

Also

Linking Words

working with a large company or facing the public can lead to growth of their

confedence

Correct your spelling

confidence

and increase their experience.

However

Linking Words

, spending lots of working time for student can drive them to forget their homework and get a lower amount sleep hours. A study done by

king's

Fix capitalization

King's

show examples

College London shows that 60% of the

students

Use synonyms

who work

while

Linking Words

they are in school have lower grades and higher brain fatigue compared to

students

Use synonyms

who prefer not working

while

Linking Words

studying.

To conclude

Linking Words

, the advantages of working part-time

while

Linking Words

studying outweigh the disadvantages by increasing their financial status and gaining confidence.

osama.alsaiady

Sep 4, 2025

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task response

Your view is clear, but you need stronger proof for your main idea. State why the good side is stronger in a sure way.

coherence

Add more strong points and give real proof or facts to back them up. Use fewer general words.

language

There are many spelling and grammar mistakes. Fix errors like part-time, confedence, and king's College London. Use simple, correct words.

coherence

Use simple link words to show cause and result, and to move from one idea to another (because, so, as a result).

organization

Structure needs a clear start, middle and end. Have one main idea in each paragraph.

accuracy

If you mention a study, be clear about it and avoid wrong facts. If you point to data, explain where it comes from.

task response

The essay shows a clear view and tries to answer the task.

coherence

There is a try to discuss both sides and to give an example.

language

Some real effort to use data and reasoning.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

191 words

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Many students do part-time work while they are studying. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

One long-distance flight consumes fuel which a car uses in several years’ time, but they cause the same amount of pollution. So same people think that we should discourage non-essential flights, such as tourist travel, rather than to limit the use of cars.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to the enrollment officer in a college requesting an exception for joining

Some people believe that social networking sites have a considerably detrimental effect on individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? 5.0

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.