Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree? Beka

Many processed foods and drinks contain a large amount of
sugar
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, which can lead to serious health issues
such
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as obesity and diabetes. Some
people
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argue that making these
products
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more expensive would reduce consumption. I partly agree with
this
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idea. On the one hand, increasing the cost of sugary
products
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can be an effective way to reduce their use.
Additionally
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, when prices rise,
people
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are less likely to buy unhealthy items regularly.
For example
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, some countries introduced a tax on soft drinks, and sales dropped within a few months.
Furthermore
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,
If
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if
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sugar
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-filled snacks and beverages become more costly, many families will choose healthier and cheaper alternatives,
such
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as fruits or fresh juices.
This
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would improve public health in the long term.
On the other hand
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, simply raising prices may not completely solve the problem. Low-income groups may be affected the most, as they already struggle with limited budgets.
Moreover
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,
people
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who are addicted to
sugar
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may continue buying these
products
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despite higher costs. Education campaigns and clearer food labels are
also
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necessary to teach
people
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about the dangers of too much
sugar
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. Schools,
for example
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, can play a major role by promoting healthy eating habits among children.
Therefore
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,
while
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pricing policies are helpful, they should be combined with other strategies. In conclusion,
however
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, making sugary
products
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more expensive could encourage
people
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to consume less, but
this
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measure alone is not enough. A combination of higher prices, education, and awareness is the best way to reduce
sugar
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consumption and protect public health.

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structure
Your view is clear but some points need more detail. Add one strong idea in each body paragraph and tie it to the task.
language
Check grammar and punctuation. Use shorter sentences so the meaning is easy to read.
strength
Clear main position and a plan shown in the conclusion.
strength
Use of an example (tax on soft drinks) to back up points.
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