IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Students today can easily access information online, so libraries are no longer necessary. Do you agree or disagree?

It is widely argued nowadays
,
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apply
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 that with the easy access to all
information
Use synonyms
 on the
internet
Use synonyms
, the existence of traditional
liberaries
Correct your spelling
libraries
 is no longer required,
while
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,
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apply
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 some believe against
this
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 view. I strongly disagree with the fact
,
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apply
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 that libraries are no longer useful, and I will explicate my point
further
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 in
this
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 essay.
Firstly
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, I strongly believe that
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 only offers objective
information
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 on any article or book.
Therefore
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, for
more
Correct article usage
a more
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 detailed explanation, one needs to get into
depth
Correct article usage
the depth
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 of the research, which
,
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apply
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 can only be found documented in the libraries, because the traditional writers used to record their discoveries, and
then
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 hand
over to them
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them over to
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for
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apply
show examples
the general masses to read them.
Furthermore
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,
library
Correct article usage
the library
show examples
 provides a
quite
Use the right word
quiet
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 environment which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 us to focus on the topic, as compared to the
internet
Use synonyms
 which has
Correct article usage
an immensive
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immensive
Correct your spelling
immense
 amount of distractions available.
For example
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,
a
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apply
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research showed that 80% of scholars from
oxford
Fix capitalization
Oxford
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 confirmed
,
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apply
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 that they were able to succeed in their educational
persue
Correct your spelling
pursuits
, because they used to study from actual books
of
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from
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library
Correct article usage
the library
show examples
, and not
the
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apply
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e-books.
On the contrary
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,
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internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 has its own benefits,
such
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 as
,
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apply
show examples
 it helps an individual to have access to any
information
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according to
Linking Words
 their needs, and whenever they want. It offers them an
oppotunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to gain
information
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 on any topic by sitting at home, and without going through
trouble
Correct article usage
the trouble
show examples
 of visiting a library. Henceforth,
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 saves both time and energy of an individual, by bringing all the required
stastics
Correct your spelling
statistics
 and knowledge
at
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to
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 their home.
However
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, we cannot escape the fact that
although
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internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 makes our life easier,
but
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apply
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it
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also is
Correct word order
is also
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 full of distractions, and very easily diverts
attention
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the attention
show examples
 of an individual from the main topic. Conclusively, I would say that libraries
more
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are more
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 necessary as compared to
internet
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,since the former has more storage of
information
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 than
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the later
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later
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latter
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.
Moreover
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, it offers an ambience
that is
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quite
Use the right word
quiet
show examples
 and peaceful
offering
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, offering
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 more study time, as compared to the
internet
Use synonyms
, which provides excessive
hinderance
Correct your spelling
hindrance
 to proceed with it.

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language
Many errors stop clear meaning. Use simple, short sentences. Check grammar and spelling.
structure
Make one clear idea per paragraph. Use a simple link sentence to join ideas.
content
Give more precise examples to back your point. Avoid vague or off task facts.
accuracy
Be careful with facts. A few claims, like stats, should be true and from a known source.
coherence
Use linking words to join ideas, like however, also, for example, in addition.
structure
End with a short conclusion that restates your view and main point.
content
Clear view that libraries still have use, not a random choice.
structure
The essay has an opening and a closing that show plan and aim.
content
Some good points on why libraries can help study.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessible information
  • online databases
  • e-books
  • educational websites
  • community centers
  • physical books
  • literacy programs
  • peer-reviewed resources
  • misleading information
  • digital divide
  • high-speed internet
  • underprivileged communities
  • custodians of culture
  • archival material
  • conducive environment
What to do next:
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