IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays many elderly people live alone and this can cause a variety of problems. What are some of these problems and what solutions can you suggest?

Many older
individuals
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 today live alone, which can lead to a
diversity
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variety
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 of
issues
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. The main problem
this
Linking Words
 causes is the psychological
issues
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 they may face, and the most viable solution is a public awareness campaign warning
people
Use synonyms
 about the dangers of
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon. The principal problem associated with elderly
people
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 who live alone is the mental
issues
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 that they may struggle with. These psychological problems arise because elderly
individuals
Use synonyms
 rarely communicate, as they often live alone;
consequently
Linking Words
, they may feel that they are lonely and there is no one
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 cares about them.
As a result
Linking Words
, these thoughts will overwhelm them, leading them to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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depression or even
have
Verb problem
apply
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suicidal thoughts.
For example
Linking Words
, a recent government survey in Japan found that 82% of seniors have serious mental
issues
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 that may force them to kill themselves if their condition gets worse. To tackle
this
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problem
Punctuation problem
problem,
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 the government should launch a publicity campaign in the media and in schools to educate
people
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 about the dangers of allowing their elderly
individuals
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 to live totally alone. Authorities should educate
people
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 to communicate with older
individuals
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 and have a conversation regularly with them because these small moments will lighten their mood, and
this
Linking Words
 will help them
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
maintain psychological well-being. An awareness campaign could shed some light on
this
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 difficult situation and allow
people
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 to be more open and honest about it.
For instance
Linking Words
, a similar initiative in Germany resulted in a 52% decrease in seniors having mental
issues
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. In conclusion, the psychological problems faced by elderly
individuals
Use synonyms
 living alone are significant
issues
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 that can result in older
people
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 having depression, suicidal thoughts and various other mental health challenges;
however
Linking Words
, they can be addressed through educating
people
Use synonyms
 about the dangers of the phenomenon.

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tip
Plan a clear start. Use a short intro to say what you will talk about, then state the problem and the solution.
improvement
Add more than mental health as a problem. Mention other things the old alone may face, like safety and health, and how to fix them.
improvement
Make a simple mistake with facts. Do not rely on big numbers you cannot prove. If you use a stat, check it is easy to trust or don't use it.
tip
Keep sentences short and use plain words. This helps a lot in IELTS.
tip
Each idea should be shown in its own paragraph. Use linking words to show how ideas go together.
strength
The essay uses some real examples to show the issue and its answer.
strength
There is a clear link between problem and the need for action.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Isolation
  • Mental health issues
  • Physical health risks
  • Daily activities
  • Financial difficulties
  • Housekeeping
  • Personal care
  • Medical services
  • Safety concerns
  • Vulnerable
  • Accidents
  • Scams
  • Social interaction
  • Healthcare costs
  • Social services
  • Community-based programs
  • In-home care services
  • Safety measures
  • Subsidize
  • Intergenerational living arrangements
  • Emotional support
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