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Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fastfood restaurants between 2003 and 2013.

The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fastfood restaurants between 2003 and 2013.
The graph illustrates the variations in terms of the frequency of fast
food
Use synonyms
 eating in the USA in the period of ten years from 2003 to 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see that American ate the fast
food
Use synonyms
 in restaurants most once a week and once or twice a month.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the citizens who ate it each day and never had
the
Correct article usage
apply
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fast
food
Use synonyms
 occupied relatively minimal proportions. Clearly, in 2003, around 30%
American
Replace the word
Americans
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 ate fast
food
Use synonyms
 in a restaurant and slightly increased to 33% in 2006 and
then
Linking Words
 declined to 27% in 2013.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 who consumed the fast
food
Use synonyms
 once or twice a month
slightly
Verb problem
was slightly
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 lower than that weekly in 2003 (30%) and considerably less in 2006 (25%).
While
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 after six years, the percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 eating fast
food
Use synonyms
 monthly (33%) surpassed that weekly. The similar trend of
people
Use synonyms
 consuming it in the restaurant was several times a week
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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below
Verb problem
was below
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 20% during ten
tears
Use the right word
years
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.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, the following proportion was a few times a year
whose
Punctuation problem
, whose
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 figure
equaled
Use the right word
equalled
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 in 2006 and 2013 (both 15%) and lower in 2003 (13%).
However
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 eating fast
food
Use synonyms
 every day and never consuming it constituted by far the lowest, remaining Below 5% from 2003 to 2013.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words food, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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