Several people assert that the main cause of crime is an economically disadvantaged background. However, others say that crime is caused by a person's nature. Discuss both ideas and give your opinion.

There are two main views: one is the reason that
crime
Use synonyms
is caused by
poverty
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
the other is that it results from a
person
Use synonyms
's nature. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will discuss both views and give my opinion. On the one hand, some
people
Use synonyms
argue that the main reason for
crime
Use synonyms
is
poverty
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, if some
people
Use synonyms
who have lived in a poor environment, they may
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
theft more easily.
This
Linking Words
is because they may not have abundant food or clothes.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
there is research that poor
people
Use synonyms
are more likely to engage in criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
as stealing or other illegal activities. If they steal something from others, they can get clothes, food and some other things that they cannot obtain with their money.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
who are struggling with
poverty
Use synonyms
tend to commit
crimes
Use synonyms
more often than others.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
crimes
Use synonyms
cannot be explained only by
poverty
Use synonyms
. It can
be
Correct word order
also be
show examples
also
Linking Words
caused by
Use synonyms
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
show examples
nature. Even if some
people
Use synonyms
have
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
enough property, they may
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
crimes
Use synonyms
because of their disposition
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
is naturally
get
Verb problem
acquired
show examples
when they are born.
For example
Linking Words
, despite of
person
Use synonyms
who grew up in a wealthy family, if that
person
Use synonyms
has with aggressive or violent personality may be more likely to commit
crimes
Use synonyms
regardless of their background. In my opinion, I think
poverty
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
plays
show examples
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
important role in
crimes
Use synonyms
. Because
people
Use synonyms
who live in
poor life
Check wording
poverty
show examples
have
less
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer
show examples
basic necessities so they can easily engage in criminal
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
activity
show examples
or
environment
Correct article usage
an environment
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
leads them to commit
crimes
Use synonyms
so that they steal other
people
Use synonyms
's stuff or
do
Verb problem
cause
show examples
offence.Several
people
Use synonyms
assert that the main cause of
crime
Use synonyms
is an economically disadvantaged background.
However
Linking Words
, others say that
crime
Use synonyms
is caused by a
person
Use synonyms
's nature. Discuss both ideas and give your opinion.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Plan your answer well. Say the two views, then give your clear view at the end.
coherence
Use one idea in one sentence. Use simple link words to move from one idea to the next.
grammar
Fix grammar. Look for wrong verb form, wrong article, and wrong prep.
content
Give clear examples that fit the point. Do not repeat ideas.
content
You show two sides clearly.
coherence
You use good link words like On the one hand, On the other hand.
content
You state your view in the end.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • economically disadvantaged
  • necessities
  • societal factors
  • external circumstances
  • criminal activities
  • intrinsic characteristics
  • personality traits
  • moral beliefs
  • psychological conditions
  • predisposed
  • personal choice
  • responsibility
  • profound impact
  • circumstances
  • attributes
  • behavior
What to do next:
Look at other essays: