IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that governments should spend money on developing public transportation systems, while others think that improving roads and highways is more important. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

There is no doubt that many residents think crucial
improve
Verb problem
to improve
show examples
 the mass transit.
Others
Check wording
Others'
show examples
 opinion that
enhance
Correct subject-verb agreement
enhances
show examples
 the
roads
Use synonyms
 and highways for the reason that government should focus on
update
Wrong verb form
updating
show examples
 different
road
Fix the agreement mistake
roads
show examples
 for
cars
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
 public
Use synonyms
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss
more
Correct article usage
the more
show examples
 comfortable side for individuals and
also
Linking Words
 how
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public transit is significant for inhabitants. On the
one
Use synonyms
 hand, the authorities should pay attention
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
Use synonyms
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
 owning to it is to encourage
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the environment.
In addition
Linking Words
, there are
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
plenty of
cars
Use synonyms
inhabitants
Correct pronoun usage
that inhabitants
show examples
 use the car for go fast their work
as
Correct word choice
so as
show examples
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
be
Verb problem
to be
show examples
 late to their job.
However
Linking Words
, the fuel
cars
Use synonyms
 reduce air pollution in the city atmosphere
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 in Uzbekistan,
there
Rephrase
where there
show examples
 are a lot of
cars
Use synonyms
 in
one
Use synonyms
 family
we
Punctuation problem
; we
show examples
 can see 5
cars
Use synonyms
 per person
Use synonyms
Punctuation problem
. one
show examples
one
Correct pronoun usage
Cars
show examples
cars
Use synonyms
 reduce pollution and
also
Linking Words
 factories. Citizens
breath
Replace the word
breathe
show examples
 the dirty air
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is why almost
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
70% of people have
varieties
Replace the word
various
show examples
 diseases.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Other people think the lawmakers focus on the prosperity of
roads
Use synonyms
 and private
roads
Use synonyms
 for rich people. These days, the number of public
transports
Use synonyms
 is not
trouble
Check wording
a problem,
show examples
for instance
Linking Words
, undergrounds, buses,
train
Correct subject-verb agreement
trains
show examples
 enough in every country
these
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
kinds of public transit. The huge issue that
of
Punctuation problem
, of
show examples
course
Punctuation problem
course,
show examples
 the numerous
own
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
cars
Use synonyms
 and traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
.
Countless
Change preposition
In countless
show examples
 countries, there are always
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 morning and evening as
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 result of
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 special
roads
Use synonyms
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
Use synonyms
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
Punctuation problem
. For
show examples
for
Linking Words
example
Punctuation problem
example,
show examples
 in
Germany
Punctuation problem
Germany,
show examples
 we can see
there
Correct word choice
that there
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 a special track for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
long buses and trains
the
Punctuation problem
. The
show examples
 government do not allow
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cars
Use synonyms
drive
Verb problem
to drive
show examples
 their and citizens who drive
Change preposition
on a
show examples
a
Correct article usage
these
show examples
 special
path
Fix the agreement mistake
paths
show examples
 for public transport to
fine
Replace the word
fined
show examples
 by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
policymakers.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 improving
roads
Use synonyms
 and highways can
facilities
Replace the word
facilitate
show examples
 trade and encourage rural communities, investing money
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 public transport
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
buses
Punctuation problem
buses,
show examples
do
Verb problem
makes it
show examples
 more comfortable like
Use synonyms
cars
Punctuation problem
cars,
show examples
numerous
Correct word choice
many
show examples
 inhabitants choose
go
Verb problem
to go
show examples
 for public transport. It can
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
help reduce the pollution not only
Use synonyms
one
Change preposition
in one
show examples
 country
and
Correct word choice
but
show examples
also
Linking Words
earth
Fix capitalization
Earth
show examples
.

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Task response
Start with a clear view. Give your opinion in the first paragraph and say what you will talk about.
Coherence and cohesion
Put one big idea in each paragraph and keep links between ideas to help flow.
Coherence and cohesion
Use simple link words like also, but, because, for example to show the link between ideas.
Grammar and wording
Write short, plain sentences. This makes sense and avoids mistakes.
Grammar
Check common errors: use 'a' and 'the' correctly, add -s for plural, and use the right verb form.
strength
The essay tries to discuss both sides of the topic.
strength
The conclusion begins with 'To sum up', which helps show ending idea.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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